Love Poetry Critic Prints

'I'm a divorce lawyer. That helps a lot because as a sideline, I'm writing love poems.'

Ed Flanders, Deconstruction Worker

"I don't care if it is itty-bitty. Turn it off!"

Dating an English Major

"The emoji she used says she loves me..."

The Book Lover

'He's a catch for any woman - there's so much to re-mould'

The Quack Quack Diaries: Quack Quack's Poetic Justice

T.S. Eliot lacks the courage to eat a peach.

"I'm texting you a love poem inspired by the emoji you sent me."

Jewellers - "If you really love your wife to be, then money should be no object."

"Swing me with your words."

"I want more than anonymous sex. I want anonymous intimacy."

"Now look, Frank, Molly, there's nothing wrong with a Polar Bear and a Penguin being in a relationship. In fact, in my experience, Polar opposites attract!"

"I'm not against going to couples therapy, but it feels weird to do it on a first date."

'I like a woman who's open and friendly, as long as she's only that way with me.'

(Diamonds shining, … Dancing, dining, …with some man in a restaurant. Is that all you really want?) (Are you making this up?) (Unsophisticated Lady)

"If you could time-travel back to any period in history, would your love for me keep you from going?"

"I miss the way it was when I thought you knew everything."

Spike Milligan

The Ballad of the Lavender Dot - Part Three

Then out in the yard, there arose such a grito that I jumped to my feet like a frightened cabrito.

A rose is a rose is a rose

Cherub tries to prevent a man from declaring his love for a woman.

Wow. Worst Tunnel of Love ever.

'Marriage ain't for this puppy. I'm way too romantic.'

"Do you think we're a storybook romance transformed into a textbook case?"

Love and temptation go hand in hand...

"He's all mine. Life is good."

'She loves me, she loves me not. Maybe, who cares, what the hey!'

'Love is composed of a single soul inhabiting two bodies.'

"I care that you care that I care about you caring... but I'm not sure if your caring is enough caring to make up for what I'm not caring enough about."

'Yes, but how long will you love me forever?'

"Come back—I can change!"

"I'll love you till the end of time."