Love Experimenter T-Shirts

'That's very sweet of you, Professor Grossmertz, but love is only a theory.'

'Is this river good for fish?' - 'Yes, so good the refuse to leave it.'

'My serotonin levels have maxed-out, my brain is awash in glucocoriticoids and, if it weren't for my leveling endogenous opiates, I'd float out that window!'

Sexual chemistry set

A sentimental woman talking to her lover on a ship

'We're looking for people who like to take work home.'

Real Estate Personals

Macho Vegetarian

'You had me at 'C - R C = (2 x S X).'

"Sometime I find it hard to believe that we found each other through regular channels."

"My aloofness is a mask."

"Now give me something intimate to say."

Human Flesh Eaters: A Romance Comedy.

'Love and marriage?- I'm afraid I can't help you much with that, young fellow.'

"That's the worst pickup line I've ever heard!"

Tunnel of Life and Love

"I've had many men in this town darling, but many men have not had me."

Wait

Sometimes in a relationship a person just needs some space.

Raymond Queneau

"I just feel like we're not connecting."

'We've been happily married for five years, but we've been married for eight.'

'Well, it is the complete works of Shakespeare all right, however this pig is claiming he wrote it.'

"You have no idea how refreshing it is to meet someone raffish in West Hartford."

"The drummer's got to go - he's too loopy."

'I'll need four character references.'

'You want to become a vegan?... Well okay, but you do realise there'll be nothing lower than you on the food chain?'

'Were you playing footsie with me?'

"Boys meet the girls. Girls meet the boys. . ."

"She's an enigma wrapped in a mystery wrapped in a bear onesie."

"We can't go on meeting like this, I'm practically broke."

"Okay, I'm intrigued."

How scientists propose

"Your hair is chaotic, but you're really quite together."

"I could see my mating dance had caught her eye, so I put more energy into it, but I ended up sweaty and out of breath: she lost interest then. . ."