Love Escapologist T-Shirts

"Your blind dates is at the bar - I'll upgrade you to a table by the getaway door."

"If my husband finds out about us. . .listen, we must cover our tracks so well that no one believes that dinosaurs and humans existed at the same time!"

"This was a wicked-hard test. I'm pretty sure everybody got a bad grade."

You're next, Mr. Kimble - right after his apple danish.

"I've just about had it with these corporate retreats!"

'Miss Fenwick - I don't want to see anyone today!'

'We need to talk about your fear of commitment, Ralph.'

"I'm at that awkward stage between credit card payments and alimony payments."

'I'm not very good at mingling.'

Man at Fire Escape sees door with 'Hot Button Issues Escape',

"Don't be afraid – it's just your office,"

"I've never been this excited about an anal probe before!"

Houdini's infancy.

Guru levitates while wife vacuums.

'Out of office - Please leave your emails in the inbox next door.'

"I am afraid Mr. Jones is in his career coaching session. Can I get him to call you back?"

"IF you wanted to leave, why didn't you just say so?"

Houdini 2019

Danny always had trouble with math. (written on board: Ohio is the capital of Wisconsin.'

'Wait for me!'

"This biography of Harry Houdini has binding on all four sides!"

"I'm un-retiring today. Spending time with my family with hell."

"I'm out if that is a manufacturer."

'Sir! Elsworth's away from his desk again!'

'Jane It used to be jungle out there'

Tortured by music

"Are you sure the Russians didn't hack my answers to make me look bad?"

"I fled from suppression, torture, exploitation and bullies."

'The entire building has settled seven inches since the first day of school due to the weight of the students' backpacks.'

Halfway around the learning curve, Bob lets go.

'Not so fast Mr. Smith... you're forgetting the fit note I've filled out for your employer.'

'Murray the magician is not here, he quit in a blaze of glory.'

"This is Munch's 'Sent to all by mistake'."

"You haven't said a word to me all night."

"You have a right to know—I've been married occasionally."