Long-term Commitment Pillows

"Forty years ago on this very seat I proposed to you. Made up your mind yet?"

"Yeah, but that one's a little bit hard to reach."

"No, no - it was great. It's just that sometime I'd like to try it missionary style."

'Bob, I know you're a Mockingbird, but a few compliments every now and then would greatly help your marriage...'

Just married and Just Single and Happy.

'Sometimes it's difficult to get their feelings to the surface.'

"Ooooooh, just what I wanted!"

'...And then, I guess our relationship got TOO meaningful.'

Reading the sports pages.

"What I really wanted was a dog, but my landlord won't allow it. So I got married instead."

'I find my job interesting because even after 27 years, I still don't know exactly what I'm doing here!'

I'm putting all my eggs in one basket.

Unconditional Loveseat

"Want to deal with some unresolved issues or just get another movie."

"Twenty five years... I think it's time we renew our towels."

"We don't have sex any more, we argue about money and you hate my mother. We should be married."

"You kept me awake all night, grinding your gums."

The Female Brain and The Other One

"I hope you don't call that a party face."

"Phil, honey, do you ever think about taking our relationship to the next level?"

"I do like you, Peter, but interfacing is a very serious step."

"Till death us do part? Don't be so bloody morbid!"

Jewelry Store Has Rings For Every Type of Relationship

"After two years of dating, we decided it was finally time to move in together."

Frank and Ernie's Relationship Advice. It's not enough to just accept that relationships are two-way streets ... You must also avoid taking side trips down alleys!

"Or we could turn on the TV and let younger, more beautiful people have sex for us."

"I'll bet there's a story there."

"When we met, Marc promised to be the wind under my wings but it turned out to be all hot air."

'Either you do or you don't - there isn't any 'cooling-off' period!'

'Are you serious? I thought 'For Better or for Worse' was just a comic strip.'

"Stop undressing me with your eyes."

"Yes, you've taught me a thing or two - but over twenty-plus years that's not much."

"We should never have committed binary fission!"

"Happy anniversary, Clare. How'd you make it so many years?" "Figured it wasn't worth the prison time."

'...Love, honor, and obey, no strings attached?'