Live Blog Enthusiast Pillows

'Don't panic! People often lose their pulse when they're following live blogs.'

News: Deaths! Deaths! Deaths!

'Nothing beats seeing your favourite band play live.'

'Let's go to our education reporter for more underreporting of school success stories.'

UK border controls relaxed.

"I can't decide what I fear the most, Putin's Russia or Putin's America."

'Greek debt was downgraded for the 11th time this week, by S&P, to P.O.S. Negative Infinity, meaning it's safer to eat uranium, than own Greek debt.'

Meet the Enemy

News Internecine: Murdoch succession battle

Apart from protest footage I forget what downtown looks like.

"This just in: one of us always tells lies; the other always tells the truth. Who's who? Stay tuned."

'I didn't think of it as someone else writing my term paper, I thought of it more as a guest blogger situation.'

Weatherman: "Tonight's weather forecast is confusing, followed tomorrow by downright bewildering."

"Er...nothing much has happened yet today...."

Idlib, Syria - The final stage

Capital Tours

Trump Destroying U.S. the Postal Service

"Hang in there everyone—we promise a cute animal story at the end."

Reporter #6: television.

"It's really important to me, as an artist, to make you feel like drinking more than usual so I get hired back."

'Those enormous worldwide internet communities.'

"Thank you! That last tune took some fancy fingerpickin'. Apologies to those in the front who may have gotten a press - on nail or two in their drink."

Big Newspaper Delivery

Classic News.

'Bad news on Wall Street. The entire stock market has been downgraded to a 'junk' classification.'

Charades

As you can see, media coverage at this event is very heavy...

'You've been killing files again.'

'According to the latest poll, 64% of the public don't pay any attention to polls...'

'And in local news: Someone is hiding behind the drapes.'

"It makes me happy that you took time to read the newspaper today."

"We interrupt this advertisement to bring you another advertisement that has just been rushed to the studio."

"You can't believe everything the Russian bots tell you."

CONGRESS, 'It was a really tight race this time -- I had to use some of my campaign contributions for CAMPAIGNING!'