Lifestyle Lifter Pillows

Wife asking husband what resolutions he is going to make for the new century

"I didn't spark joy."

"Breathe in and reimagine yourself in a world where you lived a healthy lifestyle."

"I just reached 1000 jumps."

'No, you won't live longer if you give up sex and alcohol. But it'll seem like it.'

"Death coach..."

'Where exactly did you get this 'Lifestyle Guru' from?'

'It's not my fault that I've developed habits that cannot be sustained.'

"You won’t need refills."

Macho Vegetarian

"1972: Kim and Doug invited us to their key party... Sounds groovy! 2017: We just got an evite from Kim and Doug to join them on an ayahuasca retreat in Peru... Tommy starts hockey and my father is about to die—no way."

Does it spark joy?

"This area is popular with would-be actresses and models,we call it 'Silicon Implants'."

'I don't understand it - there was a little pile of solar dust from Advanced Composition Explorer right here a moment ago.'

"Right it's decided! We are both sober for October and Stoptober. Then Movember and Decembeard and Dry January, then..."

Investment Guru/Lifestyle Guru/Tech Guru/Fashion Guru

GPs to be encouraged to offer advice on 'lifestyle' issues

'It says, 'If you want more fiber, eat the package.'

"When I say I'm rich I don't just mean in Omega 3 oils."

'Watch yourself.'

There, but for the grace of God, go I.

'I know dieting requires a change of lifestyle, Helen, but this is ridiculous!'

'Well, if you don't smoke or drink, stop chewing gum!'

Academy.

'I recently became a veggie.'

"The long and the short of it, doctor, is that I'm ready to change from a soccer mom to a Nascar dad."

"I think you're going to like today's class."

"I tried change, it didn't work."

'You want to become a vegan?... Well okay, but you do realise there'll be nothing lower than you on the food chain?'

"Actually I'm doing this to stand out more in the scholarly community."

Intentional Community vs. Community of Sheer Happenstance

"THIS YEAR I'M GOING TO GET IN SHAPE."