Life Achievements Mugs

"Mom, please! I'm a married woman whose friends have been reviewed favourably by the New York Times."

"I dunno, I guess I just don't believe in myself anymore."

'Sire, your new fortress was fine for your nephew's fifth, but I fear it is set for a sterner test.'

"Things are still a little rough for me, and occasionally I lose hope and get depressed—but I'm getting stronger every day."

Brian was very proud of his dog.

"Great! We're still going up! Chop a hole in the ceiling!"

"I wasn't the smartest guy in the room, but I was the loudest."

"This could be the year someone actually goes up there."

'You must be very proud Daphne.'

'Great news this quarter! Losses are up in smoke, profits are high, and we're seeing lots of green!'

Go! Means NOW!

"In my life, I've had seven cars, six jobs, five houses, four bypass operations, and three wives!"

"I'm telling you, she's the best in her field."

'Congratulations, you graduated.'

GCSEs

"One day, I'll be the first woman!"

Achiever: An illustration of how many thoughts she can have in a split second, while still listening to him.

"You're writing a memoir? You're seven years old. Do you honestly think you can capture the interest of readers with such a short—wait, is that my name?!"

"The good news is we've used up all our bad ideas."

Jumping Man

"Wait! I don't want to be disease resistant!"

First Prize!

"As it's your birthday, would you like to go in the Big Chair?"

"My husband's the academic. I just like to travel. I'm more of a pandemic."

"All I ask is a chance to ruin my life in my own way."

"At least our son is marrying a doctor!"

'I hear she melts glass ceilings.'

Sparkler

'I think it's really tacky to make the salesperson of the month someone from another firm.'

"The chairman said he wanted to see you when you got out of hospital."

"Once you've jumped over the moon, standing around in a field all day just doesn't cut it."

Eighth Wonder Of The Financial WorldMt. Acct.

"My name is Jose Hernandez, and my story begins when my parents moved from Mexico to the United States to work the fields. I would find my own special calling."

"I built this business from the ground up."

Isaac Newton and the Apple Tree