Library Lovers Gifts

'Yes, we have 'All You Need To Know About The Health Care Legislation' but it is part of a twelve volume set.'

Anti-social Sciences

"I can't tell you where the religious section is because I'm an atheist."

'I stole it from the library.'

Place Head in 3-D Printer: Wacko Idea #24 for short staffed agencies.

Large lady reading a large print book.

Books versus TV.

'Ooh, I'm getting a text.'

'She has an enquiring mind - like why did you do that and why didn't you do the other?'

"I can destroy your bank of knowledge with one blast from my destructo-beam!"

"No, I'm not working undercover, Timmy. School librarians are allowed to use public libraries."

"Did you like that mystery book?"

ELF help books.

Library

"If we don't want to be captured, we'll need to find a place where no one goes. Where's the nearest public library?"

Library. Frank I need to locate some biographies. Do you know where there are? This King Tut book is stored in a box down in the basement. The Napoleon biography is with the short stories, and the Henry Ford book is in the autobiography section. Unfortunately, this Amelia Earhart profile is missing - it mysteriously disappeared years ago. And what about the Albert Einstein bio? It's right up there on the top shelf. The book about Einstein and his theories is way over your head, Ernie!

American Dream/Woke

'Did Dr. Spock ever write anything about how to handle PARENTS?'

RETURN BOOKS HERE, 'I'm sorry, sir -- all our books on Houdini have disappeared.'

'I don't like it... It's too quiet.'

'Nothing too loud-she's a librarian.'

Wrong shelf.

How to save money. 'This book is late. That's a three pound fine.'

Overdue Elvis

'Did Dr. Spock ever write anything about how to handle PARENTS?'

Reference section of a library: 'Who's who (without steroids), Who's who (with steroids).

Of course the room key doesn’t work, Chuck … That's your library card.

"1984 by George Orwell. Project 2025. Presidential transition project."

"That's the guy I hired to read Proust for me."

Big Bang Theory.

'My reading comprehension is so-so, but I do make up for it with my highlighting skills.'

'The history of Glue. It's impossible to put down.'

My Bookshelf Before the Internet

Library sections; Fiction, non-fiction and do-it-yourself.

"Do you see yourself becoming a movie in five years?"