Legalization Advocates Gifts

First a Little Toke

"No, of course there isn't, 'one law for the rich and another for the poor'... There's no law for the poor."

Wal-Mart Ruling

"Before we begin, I'd like to say that in thirty years as an attorney, I've never encountered a more interesting departure from the standard last will and testament."

'...I now pronounce you man and wife, anything you say can and will be used against you in a court of law.'

"I lost some intellectual property here last night. Anybody remember what the hell I was talking about?"

'I couldn't help noticing that nobody swore YOU in!'

I'm going for former flower children. Tree's Tree Nursery. Legal pot. Legal grass. Festuca. Carex. Miscanthus.

"Impartiality becomes you."

'You were convicted by the jury, but at least you were acquitted by the media.'

'And your class story is an old, old one. In the middle of successful soul-snatching careers you were suddenly bitten by the lawyering bug...'

'Hello. My father is an attorney. This is how I allegedly spent my summer vacation.'

"Honestly, I have no idea what a 'habeas corpus' is."

'I don't believe in pressuring my children. When the time is right, they'll arrive at the default choice and go to law school.'

"We, the jury, award the plaintiffs 100 trillion dollars - just because."

'Court is recessed until the big hand is on the three.'

'Take two tokes of weed, Mrs Grunfield, and call me in the morning.'

Counsel examining witness

Trump Indicted

"Or perhaps we could just have them wear these 'M-for-Muslim' patches...."

Cannabis Dispensary: Walk-ins awkwardly trying to look nonchalant welcome!

'Your Honor, my client pleads not guilty by reason of multiculturalism.'

"Medical marijuana hotline...press hash to continue."

'According to his will, Tiddles left the bulk of his estate to himself. Because, he still has eight lives left.'

'It's bad enough I get overrules at home... why here also, Sharon?'

“Don’t underestimate his lawyers. They went to Harvard.”

'I've done some of my best work pro bono ... darn it?'

'The trouble with this country is that it is impossible to be completely legal.'

'I need to see your restraining order.'

"Truth, whole truth, nothing but the truth? I'm not ready for that much of a commitment."

Cracked Down Upon by Government? There's an App for That.

'Whoops! Get my lawyer on the phone!'

Randi Rhodes

'Mom, instead of reading me my rights tonight, how about reading me a fairy tale.'

' Even though you can't make heads or tails out of it, let me assure you, it is, heads we win, tails they lose.'