Legal Ponderer Pillows

"My basic judicial philosophy is 'Guilty.'"

'... And some primitive cultures, believed that 'the great ones' modelled us from clay.'

In/Out/These Things Happen.

Mr. Metamorphosis: "At least this better than waking up as a cockroach."

'Things have really livened up down there since You introduced SEXUAL reproduction.'

Jean-Paul Sartre

The Philosopher Pine, or, The Eternal Optimist.

Chiller Theatre

'Ignorance of the law is no excuse, especially when you're majoring in Law.'

'According to creation mathematicians, all of Euclid's theories were originally found etched into rocks.'

"Have you been playing dice?"

"Intelligent design...well, duh!"

'Oh, so now the ocean isn't GOOD enough for you?'

Sauce for the Goose

Freudian Bar & Grill...Jungian Pub: 'We can out drink those Freudians ant day of the week!...'And twice on Sunday!' ...'Yeah!' ... e

"When we're home, are we still aliens?"

A man deflates and dissolves into the ground and becomes a flower.

Plan to Split California into Six States Proposed....

The Lessons of VietnamThe Lessons of Iran and ContraThe Lessons of Iraq.

'Half an optimist is an odd bird, Sarah.'

'The organizational structure is pretty simple: We do the work; they take the credit.'

"No, I don't want to live forever, but I damn sure don't want to be dead forever, either."

'Gosh, I dunno. You sure it's organic?'

Admissions test for the Danbury Institute of Philosophy

'Look at it another way. Happiness can't buy you money!'

The Price of Freedom

"Is this who I am?"

'I hate to tell you this, but enlightenment just isn't for commuters.'

"I cross the road to forget."

'At least I don't have his life.'

Afraid of change - leave it here.

The probability of an event occurring is inversely proportional to its desirability.

'...and that is my philosophy.'

"It all started when I read somewhere that happiness is an inside job. Naturally, I assumed some breaking and entering was involved."