Legal Eagle In Love T-Shirts

"Before I give you this anonymous Valentine's card coudl you just sign this waiver confirming that you won't fall uncontrollably in love with me...or take out a sexual harassment suit!"

"When I'm with you, Miss Lawson, the billable hours just fly by."

I'm representing Rudy in your relationship discussions. It's common sense. It will enable both parties to not get too emotional. You're trying to prevent emotion from bleeding into a relationship discussion. Check. Dumbest thing I've ever heard! Calm down.

"Good boy."

"Marshall, somewhere out there, just waiting for us, is a loophole in the system."

"HR-bill 9495. Cutting down non-profits."

Solicitor speaks legal jargon and has a translator who tells client: 'You haven't a hope!'

US Immigration and Naturalization Service: If you're yearning to breath free...Get Out.

Nelson Mandela in despair over the crime rates in SA.

"Well if I can't be a cowboy I'll be a lawyer for cowboys."

'This is my partner. He'll be taking care of the small print.'

"No, of course there isn't, 'one law for the rich and another for the poor'... There's no law for the poor."

Too Many Lawyers Spoil the Broth

Neo-International Law

'No, it's not really good - that's our lawsuits-to-earnings ratio.'

"Some day, son, all this will be your ex-wife's."

"Our new associate asks how much of a fee is too much. Do you want to handle this or shall I laugh in his face?"

"What do you recommend for someone being tried in absentia?"

"Objection, Your Honor! Alleged killer whale."

"Read our contracts, Ms Donahue. It says 'No Sexual Harassment on the workfloor!'"

'If corporate lawyers are a dime a dozen, where are the other ten?'

'Call me immediately if there's any serious side effects so I can notify my lawyer.'

'Ignorance of the law is no excuse, especially when you're majoring in Law.'

The Circular Logic of Fascism

'I request an postponement, Your Honor -- I have to study for my bar exams.'

'The toughest things you have to deal with in this job, is feelings and lawyers.'

"Amen. . . void where prohibited by law."

'Look -- I'm willing to forget about all this if you are.'

Recruiting litigation lawyers is ALWAYS tricky..my last one took me to court for the emotional and professional damage I caused him by NOT considering him for a position I wasn't asked to fill.

No Parking - Scandal or No Scandal

Welcome To New York City...Subject to the following conditions.

'Upset at you for breaching the non-compete? Of course not.'

'I appreciate how you feel, but I'm afraid your report card isn't grounds for defamation of character.

"He's the chief watchdog, who watches over all the other watchdogs—but this must be his night off."

"We won!"