Left-right Direction Navigator T-Shirts

Exit next left. No, my left.

'Are you sure that's the right map?'

'Believe me, I know transformation isn't easy. I pulled a muscle once.'

'We can order Lebanese, Thai, Italian, Indian, Greek or Chinese...'

"A journey of a thousand miles begins with a MAP, actually."

The Fast Lane.

"He was the one everyone called 'The Greatest.' Then one day, a stranger turned up in town."

"I'll have the barbecued half-pounder, with all the ramifications."

"We'll start with the appetizer, move on to the entree, and then finish up with dessert."

"That's a plain burger and black coffee? But what kind of plain burger and what kind of black coffee?"

"Can I tell you about a few items that aren't on the menu?"

'Just in case there is an accident.'

New Memer/Incumbent

"I recommend number five if you have only $20 so that you can still leave a tip."

'Now what? Everything I can pronounce is OFF!'

Day one, post grad

"We suggest you study the menu in our reading room before being seated in the dining room."

Challenge and solution

I must be losing my grip, he didn't query the bill...

Wherever You Go, There You Are - Next Exit.

"Here's what we've accomplished so far"

'The Entrecote a la Bordelaise? It's stuff on a plate.'

"A number of items on that menu are consistently chosen by an overwhelming majority of the American people."

Number Phobia.

'Careful,dear- don't order anything you can't pronounce.'

"Over the river and through a ridiculous detour that has us in the middle of who-knows-where, to Grandfather’s house we go!"

'Your performance has been a steady boat in a sea of change.'

'The Chef's Salad isn't available today. She ate it herself.'

"Page 1 is 'Best-Sellers.' Page 2 is 'Advice, How-To, and Miscellaneous,' and on the back is 'And Bear in Mind.' "

"Herbert, don't! This is a gourmet coffee shop! You order instant de-caf and there's going to be trouble!"

"And then bear left at the war memorial, first right down Newton road and St Luke's is straight ahead."

'Your check? Certainly,sir -- would you like it itemized?'

"Oh shut up."