Learning New Recipes Pillows

'...now pour the mixture into a baking dish...'

"Mom is learning a new potion from the witch channel."

'I ran out of sugar, so I used salt.'

Before/After

'Life is all attitude: 45 seconds of enjoying it...45,000 hours of regretting it...'

MUSHROOM MASACRE.

'As a surprise I thought I'd give the new cookbook a try tonight.'

"Our cook is new, so ge's Googling what goes on a bacon, lettuce and tomato sandwich as we speak."

"Gracie, today I'm teaching you a Bermudez family tradition...passed down from generation to generation! Vamonos! Out! Now!"

"Do you remember when we used to put FOOD in food?"

"....And then chuck the whole lot in the dustbin and phone for a take-away."

"Voila!...smooth pastry." (Lady teaching chef to iron dough).

"Oh we're fine, my husbands just learning to cook during the quarantine."

"I'm unable to process this image."

"Was there a photo in the recipe book? I'd love to see what it's meant to look like."

'Diet considerations.'

The Inexperienced Cook

The Nervous Gourmet:Low-Risk Chicken

...If sauce has not begun to thicken after 10 minutes, pour contents back into can and wait for your wife to get home.

"We didn't have any whipped cream, so I used foaming hand soap."

'Just add eggs. That sounds easy.'

'I hope it's okay -- the cookbook had some really confusing abbreviations.'

But I followed the recipe exactly.

Eve's Gourmet Apple Recipes (snake with apple in its mouth).

Cooking with Wine: "Oops! Almost split some in the food."

'Are you sure the recipe calls for a whole cup of good burgundy?'

"That is why you don't put 'instant rice' in a slow cooker."

"Bingo, it's the hippy lady again! She always throws something interesting: last week it was honey-beer bread..."

'Women cook to feed the soul...men cook to feed the ego.'

Secret Family Recipes

"Despite countless assurances from his wife, mother and 'foodie' friends, Ed still did not trust the crock pot."

'I told you rosemary and sage, but don't add the garlic until the last half hour.'

'We'll have to eat out tonight -- I misplaced a decimal point in the cookbook.'

'I thought I'd seen everything, and then my wife came up with tofu fajitas.'

'So this is a kitchen!'