Leak Fixer Mugs

Lazy plumber.

'OK Smith, you can take this back to the Woodwork room now!'

Christmas tree with wadded up lights.

'Before you come with me, tell me...does this robe look a little rumpled to you? I don't think the dry cleaners got the creases out, do you?'

"I just love how wet you've made things in here."

'Well, the good news is; You won't need to tax and insure it.'

"Whoa. There's a huge crack down here." "Tell me about it."

'The upside is that if the water gets high enough all your termites might drown.'

Forgot your locker combination? Let Sammy the weasel pick it open for you!

System failure - calling for sysadmin...

Son? We need to talk about inappropriate life choices. I was joking. I'm not going to be an investment banker. Great! I'd hate to see you waste your talents. There are plenty of other jobs. Like the fixer who disappears famous athletes' awkward e-mails. You'll always be employed.

'Bob will be with you in a moment. He's cleaning the filter to the wine-aroma-judging-device attached to his face.'

Cyber disease.

'Agreed then? Your boy takes a dive in the fifth...'

"Dad, I'll assemble yours if you assemble mine."

'They can be a real menace at this time of year.'

'Is the drain still clogged, Henry?'

"I had to improvise"

Master Plumber

"Tell Santa that Rudolph's check engine light is on."

"Have you tried switching it off and switching it back on again - or pretending there's absolutely nothing wrong with it?"

'Freezer is on the blink.'

"Hi, I'm your new neighbour. I work as a maintenance engineer on the Thames Flood Barrier."

'Damn. The dark is leaking out of the dark room again.'

'It's our last resort.'

"People are always discriminating against my dad. At work, people say, 'clean up that spill' and 'get under the sink.'"

Hospital. Emergency. Closed. I'm bleeding and the E.R. is closed, What should I do? Just go home? Suture self!

'Please report any drips to maintenance immediately.'

'OK, Mr Smith, we're ready for your colonscopy!'

'I guess it's official now. No one in this town actually makes anything anymore.'

Boy with his finger in a leaking water bed.

'That's one way to 'shut down' the system...'

Despite being dumped by his girlfriend on Christmas Eve, Norman still found a way to pull the crackers despite her absence.

Stitches.

Boss, someone called The Fixer is here to see you. Excellent. Go out and tell him I want him to teach you everything he knows. I don't see why I should have to keep paying him when I've got my very own minion. Pay extra attention to the issue vague threats to shut down lawsuits part. If he asks why I didn't fire him myself, you tell him I've moved to Botswana. Very bad man.