Leading A Board Meeting T-Shirts

"I was just going to say, 'Well, I don't make the rules.' But, of course, I do make the rules."

'When we get there let me do the double talking.'

'I've learned a lot about myself at these meetings...like, I can fall asleep with my eyes open!'

'How can we solve this problem by eating?'

"I drink just enough coffee to make me think I can do my job."

'Asynchronous, collaborative, interactive - we're obviously on a roll.'

'The sunglasses idea would have worked if you hadn't started snoring.'

"I'll show you our growth projections but only if you promise not to snicker."

It would be a painful forty five minutes before Arthur finally admitted he left his presentation at home.

"My report to the board was perfect. They did not understand a word of it and now think I'm smarter than them."

'All those in favor of having anchovies on our pizza will signify by saying aye.'

"To summarize the year: we were taken over, we took over, we were taken over and we took over."

"Listen to everybody's opinions? Please, we're not that desperate."

'Our job will be to drag the competition down to our level.'

"I suggest we start with the low hanging fruit."

'It's my company, I'll decide whether I want to go to the partner's meeting or not.'

Office meeting

"I'm so efficient I can screw up two assignments in the time it takes most people to screw up just one."

"I love these off-site business meetings."

'As I see it, our choices are 'no' and 'hell no'.'

'Well, I'm not very satisfied with our customers, either.'

"So many take-overs and mergers, nobody remembers who he was."

"I was a lot happier with the elephant in the room."

'Brains...brains...brains...'

"He's not sleeping. He always dims his display while downloading data."

'Ms. Snack, prepare the conference room for an executive sting.'

"The only good news this year, gentlemen, is our massive bonuses."

"I can give you a little bit of focus on 2:53 next Thursday."

The Card Flinger

'I think our only choice at this point is to take the next big step.'

'You myst blow at least a 2.3 on the 'drunk with power' breathalizer before they'll promote you to upper management.'

'So far, sir, we've rejected plans A,B, C, D, E, F, and right now we're evaluating'G'.'