Lazy Workout Enthusiast T-Shirts

"It keeps track of how long you've been wearing workout clothes without actually working out."

'I want more stamina so I can watch more TV.'

Walking a dog on a treadmill.

'His workout regimen consists of 50 sit-downs every day.'

An old man exercising with hourglasses

"He is walking from 'Lands end to John'o'Groats', virtually."

"What> Fitness isn't a destination, it's a way of life."

"That's how you're getting your steps in, putting your fitness tracker on the dog?"

Fetch the Boomerang

"I've been feeling healthier since I attached my fitbit to the collar of my neighbor's terrier."

Advanced Zen for Couch Potatoes: Earl becomes One with his Lazy-Boy.

'I need to do more exercising? Are you kidding?! I'm a kind of marathon runner! I run from the bed to the fridge, then to the table, back to the fridge and then to the TV, back again to the fridge and retour to the TV day by day!'

Sleep. The magazine for people who are asleep.

'It took months of training but now she'd rather sip a martini than fetch a ball.'

Eventual Motion Machine

'It's just a recliner with built-in heart rate monitor. But look at how many big inflatable balls are sold as exercise equipment.'

The Sedentary Dead.

"Doc, I think I'm suffering from insomnia...every ten minutes the boss bursts into my office and wakes me up!"

Do it yourself - Get someone else to do it

'It's so much more enjoyable since we got an electric one.'

'This is my favorite machine in the gym.'

New Years Resolutions: Join Gym. . .Cancel Gym.

"I just got home. Let me roost a bit."

'OK, my dinner's in the oven. Where's the oven?'

"I don't get it. I hired him to workout for me every day, and I still haven't lost any weight."

"Believing life begins at 40, Dave decided to take it easy for the first 39."

'NEW Down hill exercise bike'

"Next bench is four steps."

'Its part of our new range of inactive wear.'

When Anteaters Get Lazy

"The very thought of exercise does that to him. I guess that's why it's called cross training."

Risks for the heart patient Unloading the Dishwasher "Sorry? No can do." Answering the Land Line R-R-RING! R-R-R-RING! N-nope R-R-RING!!! Doing Taxes "Doc said I should take it easy." Any Car-Related Errand "The old ticker."

Sports centre lift.

"See, you just turn it on and stand here and it slides you right to the shirt you want to wear."

Trainer. Fitness gym. Ernie does a forth-five minute workout every morning -- he call it "getting out of bed."