Lawful Adventurer T-Shirts

"Officer, shouldn't this be a time for healing?"

"well done rescuing my son. Now, your final task is to quietly transfer the baby to the cradle upstairs, without waking him."

Remember how you advised me to get a dangerous hobby to build up my self-esteem and impress people? Well, all the dangerous hobbies were already taken. You wrestle alligators

'Bloody streakers - they have a lot to learn.'

Do you ever wonder if there's really a higher power? What do you mean? Is there an all-knowing being that keeps track of you? That always knows where you are

"We should get out to the country more often."

'It was a rare accident. Lightning struck his bed pan.'

'Now, you can SWASH, and you can BUCKLE, but you can't SWASHBUCKLE.'

'I don't think you can claim for this as a substitute car ...'

'Dad, can you teach me to swim?' 'Well, I'm not much of a swimmer, but I can teach you to tread water. I do that every day at work.'

"But, Mom, how can it be a vacation when you're taking me to school?"

"My Son, of course there were only one set of footprints in the sand. I've got a hoverboard."

Three years ago during a special episode of the Ask Sadie™ show, our resident octogenarian asked readers for advice about how she could deal with her midlife crisis. You should try a radical makeover. When I hit midlife, I dyed my hair, got some tattoos, and dropped 75 pounds. My husband barely recognized me when he returned from overseas. He was not happy with my "new self," so I divorced him rather than change who I'd become. It was the best decision I'd made since I cut my thieving mother out

Life stripped bare

People of Courage

"He went to an alternative therapy seminar to find ways of reducing his stress levels..."

SELF-ESTEEM CLINIC, 'The little-bitty door is a nice touch.'

"This is our corporate evaluation pond. If you can survive a 15 minute swim, then you are management material."

Now that we're too old to migrate, we still travel, but locally. What an amazing region we live in!

Man in woods sees sign, 'No Trespassing', next to 'Go Ahead - Make Our Day!'

'I can't believe this! Is there anyone here who isn't too chicken to jump?'

'I'd like to play, but I'm afraid it might void my warranty.'

'Moses! We've been out here 39 years. Would you PLEASE stop and ask for directions??!!'

Never Apologize for Being Yourself

Moses Lost in the Desert....Year 40

'I think globally but I drink locally!'

"Willy here will be our guide, and according to him, this short walk should take about three months..."

Dial-A-Prayer and Dial-A-Mantra

Kangaroo with fishing equipment.

Church Steeple Rocket

Mr. Briggs' Adventures in the Highlands, part 5.

'Are you sure this is legal?'

'Sorry friend, you must have taken a wrong turn, this is actually the mild west... but we're having pilates after lunch if you wanna stay.'

Man knitting to other: 'My doctor prescribed golf to get my mind off business, then tennis to get my mind off golf, then bowling to get ...'

It Works!