Law Office Antics Gifts

Law Office High Jinks

'We're just like family. Stop mumbling, Cindy. Straighten up, Fred. Get that hair out of your eyes, Janet...'

"Of course you can resign Ferguson. How would you like to buy back your freedom? Cash, credit card or easy payments?"

'Who says justice has to be the only thing on tap?'

"Why, if it isn't Henshaw caught in the Overtime Warp again."

"Sklar, Liebowitz, Rubin and Kaminsky... Attorneys a go-go."

"Permission To Treat Prosecutor as Hostile, Your Honor?"

'This is going to be good, he's taking water balloons into the board meeting.'

"I've put every one of those vital master copies through here, and it took ages. Where do the copies come out?"

'When you are done balancing in your chair we will continue the meeting.'

Office Competitions

"Mr. Evans, it's a speeding ticket. You can't plea insanity."

"Guess who's going to be on national television apologizing to the American public."

Disorder in the Court!

'Hello. Law offices of Anderson, Avery, Baer, Barton, Baston, Caggly, Cooper ... drat, who comes after Cooper?'

"Your wife's on the phone...."

Clive Anderson

Out and In.

"He seized the day again. Now how do we get it back?"

'Well, that's a helluva great business plan... What have you done before you founded a management consultancy, Mr... umh... Smith?'

"He put the 'fun' in funding."

"If it please Your Honor, may I redo the bench?"

"I think I can get you off with a lighter sentence, but it might screw up your movie deal."

"Case dismissed."

"A cashier told me to have a nice day and I didn't. Am I liable or can I sue her?"

'To save the state the expense of a trial, I thought I'd run off to Spain.'

'If the verdict is guilty, Mr. Foreman, simply say 'Guilty.' Please refrain from shouting 'Yer outta here'....'

"Don't forget to torch the place when you leave."

'No kidding? You don't wear anything underneath either?'

"When I said I wanted him for the firm 'dead or alive' the emphasis was on 'alive'."

'I need a lawyer who specializes in guilty people.'

CEO practices his golf in the office.

'That looks like an unauthorized ride on the mail cart.'

Why is it that you're always being eaten by a tiger when I call you in here, Popper?

"I don’t understand, having a pulmonary embolism isn’t on his ‘To Do’ list!"