Laugh-loving Cook Prints

Noodle exchange program.

Amy Sedaris

'I used to think I was the only one kids hated... I don't know what I'd do if it weren't for you guys.'

'Muriel's philosophy is that what happens in the kitchen, stays in the kitchen.'

'For a small extra charge, we can provide a specially-formulated digestive enzyme.'

'Dinner will be ready soon -- the submarine sandwiches are soaking now.'

'Needs more kale.'

Luigi's Career Change From Pizza Shop Owner to Masseuse Goes Smoothly...

'We thank you for this food and ask you to protect us from pesticides, additives and preservatives.'

"Patience, you can have it back in a minute..."

Great Moments in Culinary History.

"How many times must I tell you, the floor is sloping?"

'Home-made pie will be quick, I only live 10 minutes from here.'

'Something in the fridge has gone off.'

Beth realized she wasn't such a great cook the night she tried to make an apple pie. 'Wow! Now that is good meatloaf!'

'I found a way to make dinner in half the time. I don't finish it.'

'Alphabet soup? -- oh, an intellectual, eh?'

Roger wouldn't prepare any meal without first consulting his pie chart.

'Mom's a lousy cook.'

'To cook is to dare!'

"Some volcano roll!"

Tofu: Firm, Soft, Amusingly Jiggly

Whoa! Willard, you know you can't put metal in a microwave! Why not just heat it the old fashioned way and use your nostrils?

'I thought I'd try making marmalade. Do we have any marmals?'

Operating table.

Le Bolshie Chef.

'I can't cook wooly mammoth like your mother used to because wooly mammoths are EXTINCT!'

"Sure it tastes like homemade... your wife works here."

Home on the Range.

'I have to go on a diet. Evidently the best things in life aren't fat free!!'

It's hard to when I'm always under pressure."

Hell's kitchen /Beans only.

'Something moved!'

"Oh no, I'm not the Lady of Shalott, I'm just the Lady of Plain Old Onions."

Escaping Egg