Laptop Jokesters Prints

'I'm a lap cat. So, naturally I prefer a laptop.'

"Darn autocorrect!"

Press Any Key. No, Not That One.

'Maybe we have the wrong subject for this brain mapping project.'

'I think the computer has a crush on me. It asked me to remain after class.'

"I think you should hire me for my vast software knowledge. . . and then pay for me to go learn software."

"Don't forget the nucleus has mass."

'The problem seems to be in the memory bank.'

"...and we hope that, for a cyber-crime, you will consider a cyber-penalty."

Great progress has been made in the science of genetic clowning.

"I thought he would run all sorts of scientific tests."

"Come on, dear...you can't blame everything on Russian hackers."

The Screeeen!

'He's just de-man's-best-friended me.'

'Okay! Who changed my screensaver?'

'At the moment, it's only weakness is flypaper.' - (spyplane research dept.)

Witch uses broom from broom share program.

"I'm disabling autocorrect, because it reminds me too much of my mother-in-law."

Relativity explained; the woman on the train will always appear more attractive than the woman on the platform.

To put your right foot in, press 5...to take it out, press 6... to put...

'When I said you will get an office with windows, I was referring to the operating system on the computer.'

Cloud computing.

"Try switching if off and on at the same time."

Homework eating dogs

'Common cold? We thought you said 'caramel corn!''

"Stand back? corrupt file."

"Turns out I'm not the wise old paramecium I thought I was."

'You lacked the necessary maturity to see this project through ... NAH-NAH A YEAH YEAH!'

"OK, I'll go to my room, but one day I'll get back at you by going to college and putting you into deep financial debt."

"In the end we decided to name him PJZK45Mz! So we could remember our computer's password."

I think you're using the old remote...

"These stem cells taste funny."