Language Mix-up Aficionado Pillows

"I said hot, boiling oil! Not cold, refreshing milk!"

Wordplay: In The Bag.

'Thank goodness you were wrong mom, dad says a period is what comes at the end of a sentence.'

"It lost a little something in translation."

"I stand corrected."

"Sorry, that's not my table."

We Will Beat Any Genuine Quote...

Staff Yearbook

"Oui, c'est bon. It is, how you Americans say, 'Magically Delicious'."

'Do it write the first time.'

'In today's market hyperbole was up sharply. Similes and metaphors held relatively steady with euphemisms hitting another record low.'

Dyslexia is no longer a disorder...

"They're home...the party's over!"

'Eh...our costume party was last Saturday!'

'Thank god for the spellchecker!'

"I was punctuating sentences long before you guys came along!"

For Pete's sake, Shirley, stop acting so smug about "getting carded." We were in a library.

'I think I have aixelsyd.'

Scouse For Beginners

Spellng Bee

Proof Reading

Oxford Lexicon of Excuses for Bad Grammar and Faulty Spelling.

'Yes, sure, certainly, you bet, of course, yeah, right, yep....'

'You understand, of course, that my memoirs must be written in ELITE type.'

'Really? — the 'Carpe Diem'?'

'Once a donzel, the dyvour now settled for orts.'

Exclamation Marks Chasing the Question Mark.

Correct Spelling Lane.

'Sorry.. I don't date lower-case types.'

Enoch Powell.

A tour guide speaks in hieroglyphs,

I hear you're sending Rudy to a clandestine meeting with Russian agents for the purpose of coordinating the blackmailing of the American president. What?! I am not! What ever gave you such an outlandish idea? I overheard Rudy asking Siri "How do I say 'hello' in Russian?" That proves nothing. Then he said "Siri, how do I say 'my boss wants your boss to blackmail our president' in Russian?" That could mean anything. Then he said "Siri, how do I say 'that means exactly what it sounds like it means

"He spent all morning trying to teach me my own name."

PHARMACY, 'Tell Hippocrates to write his prescriptions in Greek -- I can't read Babylonian!'

"I'm not a food critic I'm a literary critic and I've found the prose on your menu to be second-rate."