Lakeside Humorist T-Shirts

'Dewey! You getting any strikes?'

Cash Machines From Across the Land

"It was a cheese and wine party but the mice got there first!"

"Hey, welcome to the Catskills. Anyone here from New Jersey?"

Castro's successful invasion of miami beach.

'You're supposed to bring the newspaper to ME!'

Lady to angler whose line is snagged: 'You would manage to get your line caught in the one tree in this entire massive lake.'

'...the really big ones can be found.'

"Welcome to Randolph, Vermont. Don't even think of relocating here!"

'Have you been taking your medicine every day?'

Scene on the English coast.

"Tony and Stephanie are from Iowa."

'It must be a milkfish.'

'Which end's the shallow end?'

Making Things Pleasant.

"Is that true love or what? My masters are vegetarians, but they still buy me juicy bones..."

No petting in the pool!

Tentacle attacking diver.

Skating by torchlight on the Serpentine.

Overnight Programming

"Oh, are you attacking from home today?"

'Aren't you supposed to drop the clam on the rock?'

Get out of the kiddy pool Harold!

'Ha! Fake out!'

Witch steals a traffic man's Go sign.

'Don't press so hard, I almost drowned back there!'

"...You shouldn't by any chance be missing one of your animals?"

'Old fart and the sea'

'Which is the deep end?'

'The double codpiece and chips is very popular with the Blackpool crowd, your highness.'

'I'll trade you three eight-inch shiners for that 24-inch bass.'

"Please listen carefully as our menu options have changed..."

"Winning isn't everything - it's the only thing!"

'The gannets are worse than the gulls!'

'Is that a thong or is your rear end devouring your swimsuit?'