Laboratory Researcher T-Shirts

Scientist with 'bingo' out tray (which is empty).

'Dr. Sykes is very important in scientific circles. We believe he may be the missing link.'

'This sort of thing is inevitable whenever Wainwright and Collins debate an open versus closed universe.'

Walking the dog that is also a cow

"So what would you conclude is the primary cause of aggression in mice?"

"These stay-in-place tests are torture."

"My older self travels back just to remind me to put the cap back on this pen?"

'Dr.Sall Thompson got so excited over the new spring design she took a quantum leap!'

"We're bringing the arts and sciences together here by giving crayons to mice."

'I pledge allegiance to the atom, and to the periodic table on which it stands, many particles indivisible, with orbitals and electrons for all.'

"You have to believe what you're doing will lead to something valuable, even though it probably won't."

"I hope he has skeletons in his closet."

"It started with a simple case of peer-review."

When Love In The Laboratory Turns Sour.

Wilhelm Rontgen's first attempt at X-rays: shining a bright light through Madame Rontgen.

"I'm going to get you fired."

'Well, I guess we're the control group.'

Superbug Research Go For It / Got it

"Do you realize that you and I have it in our power to cause quite a brouhaha?'

"Boss is coming! Discover something!"

'Friends, lab rats, country mice, lend me your ears...'

Jars containing a Brain and a Brain Fart.

'Well, well - this should create a nice little wave of panic and hysteria.'

"Perkins! What have you gone and done now...??"

'You have received a grant from the king - his secret incantation to chant over your experiments.'

Genetic Fingerprinting.

Miami Mice

"The trouble is, professor, you see the Erlenmeyer flask half empty and I see it half full."

Viral Pathology Center (janitor finding three dead bodies)

'I don't KNOW what I'm doing -- this is pure research!'

'Catch this!'

"Oh, oh - it's getting into organic."

'DNA...nature's bar code.'

Biologists often consult with microbiologists.

'You've made a breakthrough in FINANCIAL research?', 'Yep! - I split the ATM!'