Kitchenware Sales Associate T-Shirts

'My favorite kitchen tool will always be the old fashioned fork moving automatically to my mouth!'

''ere - I thought you said your pans were non-stick!'

Happy Knife, Happy Wife

"Microwave to replace gas or oil central heating?" "Yes. Think how cheap it is to microwave a cup of tea!"

Clyde in his 'egg-beater.'

"That’s a toaster. It’s a tanning bed for bread."

"Good news! She's asking for her Banana Republic and Williams-Sonoma catalogues."

'It's hard to slice a potato once you've looked it in the eye.'

"We'll have to eat out tonight - I misplaced the can opener."

Chef: 'Howz that Octopus coming along Jeff?'

"I can't get the price sticker off this non stick pan, you sold me!"

"My kitchen is very small. Do you have any with doors that swing in?"

Get me a bottle of house white. I need to clean the stainless steel surfaces.

Jim's Smart Kettle

Origin of the 'spork'

The History of Anti-stick

Flatware Follies.

Yard Sale: Like-New Kitchen Gadgets

"Don't you ever miss the hustle and bustle of the old tar pits?"

'I'll swap you my Wimbledon freebies for your Anodised pan set!'

"You were warned about inter-utensil relationships."

JERRY SPRINGER'S GUESTS TODAY

"So much to do... so little time."

'I just can't picture it in our kitchen ..got any sticky notes or magnets and crap we can plaster all over it?'

Pop-up toaster.

Baldo suggests getting a frying pan for his tia and she hits him in the head with it.

Bananas eye the blender

Teapot

A watched kettle never boils.