Kitchen Raider Mugs

"Just bring me something that's going to look good on social media."

You're the puff in my pastry!

To do before Saturday...

Believe it or not: Once upon a time Dads couldn't even boil water.

Kiss the Commander in Chef

"OK, duty roster for today: Ken is to scout for entrees, Tim for mains and of course, Tina for desserts..."

The dress uniform of the Catering Corps

"I've been listening to your podcast. And though I agree with your opinion on deforestation and global warming, I strongly disagree with your claim that I overcook my pasta."

"I bet you can't name one person who makes a better lengua casserole than me!"

"Hey!-This looks like a good place!"

"...I should have seen it coming...The busboys, the waiters, the dishwashers, the maitre d', all stealing shrimp, caviar, lobster, but ah, the strawberries, that's where I had them?"

"Dad, did you know Tia Carmen got a job at my school cafeteria?"

A butcher and his apprentice.

Cook being told what to do by housemaid

'Use by June 2007. Gah' - 'Use by July 2007. Double gah.' - 'Best of a bad bunch...'

'Bugger it, we're out of beer!'

'I don't care what the timer says - my nose says they're done.'

No matter your skills, there's something you can volunteer to do.

'LOOK RENOLDSON, i've had JUST about enough of your moaning and groaning! IF you can't stand the heat, GET out of the oven!' / A chef scolding his apprentice inside an oven.

'There's something wrong with the slow cooker. I check it every minute but nothing's cooking!'

'Come over here and nag me, I'm homesick.'

"I can't get the blasted tin opener to work."

April 12,1989: The last day Ryan ever ate pancakes. 'I ran out of pancake mix so I fried up patties of my facial cream.'

'Isn't it time you got over your silly fear of water?'

Pizza and Related Searches.

"It's cold outside. You're not going anywhere without your oven mitts!"

No fly zone

'Coming to you direct from table nine; 'the polenta is cold'.'

'I just need enough to send my Dad to cookery lessons!'

'I know I promised to love, honour and cherish you but I don't remember saying I'd cook for you.'

"This Bounty is useless against the Quicker Messer Maker."

"Okay, I get the message."

'Cookery is the new rock n' roll'