Kitchen Quip Collector T-Shirts

"Our steaks are unusually tough tonight."

"Cheers! Well, this is exciting. I've never had a dinner date with a duck before." "Relax, honey. I'm just here for the bread."

"It's the sequel to 'Cooking for One'."

Cook and her Maids

'Well, ex-CU-U-Use ME!'

"He painted 300 pictures in his lifetime. 1000 of which are in England."

Jar Wars: 'Use the forks Luke... Use the forks!'

'Chef told me I had to have guard before I used the mixer!'

'Too much salt!'

"Life is pointless."

'The doctor said I was ready for solids, but not this solid!'

Whipping Cream

'By the time I'd watched Delia and Ainsley and Jamie Oliver and Floyd...I'd spoiled the broth.'

Flatware Follies.

Intolerant Chef

Beard helper

"You know what would compliment this meal? A nice vintage milk of magnesia"

'I know you are doing your best, but it will be great when Pat comes home.'

"The recipe says if you're out of eye of newt you can substitute it with two bat gizzards."

'Maybe it's one of those super-stations.'

'Somebody spiked the punch!'

'I like home cooking if it's in someone else's home.'

Teapot

'I do know the capital of France. It's the letter 'F'!'

'... And you're positive that you didn't order, fly soup?'

'I know you're sensitive, Wally, but I only asked you to help wash the dishes!'

'Regardez - even le grand Escoffier cries quand il slices les onions.'

'I never criticize your cooking, Elaine... I criticize your serving!'

"Your food will be out as soon as we clean up from the chef's little bout with food poisoning."

Trouble was brewing at the party when the pot called the kettle 'black'.

'Should my souffle blow the oven door off?'

"Egg Beater"

"According to its DNA, your meatloaf is from an unknown species."

Yeah, I get it, it's hot - but you don

Dish and spoons, "She always goes off with the dishy ones"