Kitchen Chaos Adventurer Mugs

'I think the toaster oven shorted out the espresso maker.'

'I think the salmon is thoroughly smoked.'

'Mildred-thy milk runneth over!'

Cookbooks

"First cook the cake, then apply icing sugar and candles..."

'Don't worry. They say the first 24 months of living in a house during remodeling are the hardest.'

"Yo - I'm way overdone in here!"

Man's cooking explodes.

I made you a cake!

How to correctly estimate cooking time

'and then stand in dish for two hours.'

Ten out of ten for effort...

TV chef sets the TV on fire.

Girl who can't cook meets guy who can't fix stuff.

'Your fingers are in the soup?' - 'Of course they are. It's freezing in that kitchen.'

"Shouldn't you use a plate?"

The Inexperienced Cook

'Now time for a coffee while hubby cleans up the mess.'

'I burned my fingers by touching the hot breakfast eggs, but next time, I'll peel them before I put them into boiling water!'

'The cake timer dinged, Mom, and so did my stomach.'

Anti-inflammation recipes

Junior Masterchef - "Darren Smith and I'll be cooking chicken nuggets with Mars bars in a CocaCola sauce"

Chef De Party.

Cooking

'Gary freaked out a bit and went way off the griddle.'

The world's worst restaurant. Now under new bad management.

Disaster in the kitchen.

Chef's Specials - Hissy Fits, Shouting and Swearing, Pompus Indigestion.

Time for pancakes!

'If they rise they're scones. If not they're pancakes.'

Mrs Jones's fish pie could be smelt for miles around!

"We didn't have any whipped cream, so I used foaming hand soap."

'Don't blame me - It's my husband's cooking!'

'Oh, yes. We often have people around when my Wife cooks... Usually, the fire brigade.'

Chef: 'Howz that Octopus coming along Jeff?'