Keyboard Collector T-Shirts

'The tech department said your new keyboard should be in sometime today.'

"Could you let Mitten sit on all your keyboards to see which one she likes?"

"These are the very weapons your mother and I used in our famous duel."

'It's genuine 17th century satsuma - and the pair would have been worth ?14,000.'

Ask me about my litter! !

"Did you bring any protection with you?"

Alphabet soup gets cold for slow readers.

'Heirloom Tiffany Lamp Delivery. I Brake for Everything.'

"Harry?... Is that you?"

A woman playing a keyboard

His cubicle had come to be known as 'Teddy Bear Heaven'.

'... Going once...going twice...aaaand--sold! To the gentleman in the front row for a thousand words.'

'...So you claim this is genuine Rembrandt?'

"The children took off their own coats this morning, Pastor."

"My dad says this pencil was once used by William Shakespeare." "Is it 2B or not 2B?"

"We're the same age, but you look great! What's your secret?"

The Escape Key

"Keep practicing, and someday you'll be able to play the two songs you remember at houses that also have pianos."

Armstrong, the new Ybox game console comes out next week. I've got to get in line at Computer Villa. Nope. You are callous and inhumane. Fortunately, I have a backup plan. Computer Villa sale! If anyone cuts, chew their nose off.

'It's not encrypted, Captain. That's just the clerk's usual typing.'

"Donald, the dog wants to get back in."

"Twenty-five thousand, do I hear thirty thousand? Let me remind you all - this is the last Thin Mint cookie in the sleeve..."

"Fetch, Ernie, fetch!"

"I'm just making a few behavioral notes in my journal, then I'll chase him."

'I think you'll find this just as much fun as 'Grand Theft Auto IV''

"Hey, Dad, guess what? My Honus Wagner baseball card is worth $2.1 million!"

Doric, Ionic, Corinthian, and Broken Pillars.

"It's a flip phone. I guess we can document this as an ancient, archaeological discovery."

"Please feel free to browse."

"Now now, what have I told you about using your zombie knife at the dinner table..."

"He's our back-up if our computers fail."

"I'm sorry, I can't assist with this request."

"I wonder what this was for."

'How old is this vase?'

"Pressing the escape key won't get you out of the boss' doghouse."