Job Security Worrier Mugs

"I'm worried management will find someone offshore..."

I've left your pin on the map, but I've loosened it.

In case you're fired.

'It isn't just you, Wally. We've all been put on the endangered species list.'

'See, I told you - nobody's job is safe!'

'We don't need management consultants, we let the detiny decide: You're fired... you're fired... you're fired...'

'But what if my job doesn't want to go to China?'

'The company's restructuring a bit folks, more efficient, more streamlines...so, sorry Phil, we're letting you go.'

"I'm afraid this is one fire we may not be able to put out!"

"The good news is you’re the only one we’re not firing ... the bad news is you’re the only one to run the department."

'Don't think of it as being a yes man, think of it as being an employed man.'

"Sorry, we've found an app that's better at being you than you!"

37 years in the same position.

"It used to Casual Friday. Now it's Furlough Friday."

"Hiring someone to replace me and then expecting me to train him just doesn't sit well with me."

"First the good news - one of us hasn't been made redundant."

"How have you managed to keep your job?"

Get Well Soon and Hurry Back to the Office. . . Before Sharks Eat Your Job

"My boss had security escort me out of the office today. I'm worried this means I won't be getting a bonus."

'Money is a bit tight at the moment, so instead of cash we wondered whether you'd settle for 20% more meaningless protestations of how much we value you?'

"A wage increase to match inflation."

'Following your 'barbecue summer' forecast, I'm revising predictions of your contract being reviewed.'

'Of course I'd never fire you, Nelson. You've been working here for such a long time, you've become part of the furmiture!'

'I'm fired, am I -- What's that supposed to mean?'

'To show you I'm not all bad, I won't be letting you go until after 'Bring Your Child To Work Day'.'

'Times are tough, Smith, but I don't want to lay you off. So, to keep you working, I want you to wash our building. That should keep you busy for the next decade.'

We're so pleased with your twenty years work, we've decided to offer you a two year short term contract.

'And this is Bert, our intern. He's been with the company for 46 years!'

'I am sure you will enjoy working here until your inevitable layoff.'

'The best thing about working here is that nobody is irreplaceable.'

Redundancies

'Our retirement program is that you can resign whenever you want to.'

'We think a lot alike - and that threatens my uniqueness to this company.'

'I'm afraid you'll have to find another way of showing how crucial you job is, Johnson!'

"Grunzman, I really appreciate you. I appreciate you to work somewhere else."