Job Reference Juggler Pillows

'Do you have any job references that aren't imaginary?'

"You've proven your worth a hundred times over. Let's try for a thousand."

'Take two tablets the moment you begin to feel indispensable.'

'No, your guess isn't as good as mine.'

'Let me worry about the one percent inspiration, you just take care of the 99 percent perspiration.'

Can do...No can do

'Go right in -- he's expecting you.'

"Don't worry about missing the meeting, Henshaw. We assigned all the actions to you."

'Your main goal in this job is getting out alive.'

Desk Boxes: 'In', 'Out', 'Could Go Either Way'.

"Your credentials are impressive, Carter but... quite frankly, Mr. Biggles doesn't seem to like you."

"Look Billington, if you can't take the strain, tell me, ok?"

Counting part time employees is the new math.

'Your resume and interview were so bad, not only did you not get the job, I'm having you arrested as well.'

Deadline

"JB wears many hats. He just can't delegate"

'I find my job interesting because even after 27 years, I still don't know exactly what I'm doing here!'

Jason and the Aga notes,

'Dear, you know how I hate it when you bring your work home.'

Guess which "squeaky wheel" got another raise.

'You call it diversified work experience.. I call it can't hold a job.'

'Well I like to think every cloud has a silver lining.'

'Ah, Williams, are you familiar with the term ‘Poisoned Chalice'?'

'Yes sir, I'll get right on it. Would you like it done with or without gusto?'

Brickie's Mate

SNAKE CHARMER: snake reads 'help wanted' ad.

"Misunderstood,overworked,underpaid and stressed, it's bound to lead to depression...still enough of my problems,what can I do for you?"

'Welcome aboard, Bob. Your job is to figure out what the hell happened here.'

'What do I do around here? Sir, I really think I deserve some time for research and preparation before answering that.'

'Regarding where you stand for a payrise - you don't.'

(an employee is in grasp of a giant octopi.The employee's boss is yelling at him through a bull-horn) 'Mr. Smith! According to H.R., you can no longer be employed here! Alright H.R., you can set Mr. Smith down now!'

Waiter: 'I'm not really a waiter, I'm an actor. I'll act like I'm waiting on you.'

Overworked

'I think we need a good Project Manager to coordinate our efforts...'

",,,and what's more Pearson, it hasn�t gone unnoticed that you're not meeting deadlines"