Job Negotiation Gifts

"I've never said this to a woman before, but here goes: We're not paying you enough."

"Boss, my living wage is on life support!"

'Salaries Manager. No.'

'Here it comes. He's about to give me a number.'

What about the company car you promised?

'You're asking for money? Now you're really pushing it.'

"Tell R&D that I'm going to reinstate their benefits - quick!"

'Well, the new contract appears to be a win-win, just not for physicians.'

"And need I remind you, the 'art of the deal' is the lifeblood of this company."

"Can I savor this for a few moments? The ball's never been in my court before!"

"Stock options for your thoughts."

Brian wanted to call the presentation "Synergy". Paula wanted to call it "Cooperation". They could never agree.

"Here's what I'm gonna do."

I hope a starting salary of 80 and a severance of 12 is acceptable....

'When we get there let me do the double talking.'

'Which 'win' is ours? Because the one on the left looks bigger.'

'I'm glad you guys could work this out in a reasonable manner.'

UK/US Free Trade Deal

'It's a deal, lets sniff bottoms!'

"They're having a fight over how best to handle client conflict."

"Then we have an unspoken agreement?"

"Well, it looks like the merger is off."

"That's Paul, he's our head of partnerships..."

'You think I'm crazy; I think you're crazy...finally some common ground!'

'We're making progress. I just got a firm 'maybe'.'

'I ace 'wheeling' but I flunked 'dealing'' - Boy on leaving Business Administration.

'Try and be negative in a positive way.'

SALE

"What if he's bluffing? What if he's not? What if the room just gets too hot?"

The Evolution of the Bonus

Tug of Negotiation and Conciliation.

'Pick a contract...any contract!'

'Ok, here's the meeting agenda ... it's gonna be a long one.'

'Gentlemen, I've been authorized to sweeten the offer.'

'Negotiations have reached an impasse, legal recommends we resort to violence.'