Jet-setter Humor Pillows

"You're getting warmer."

Cow Blue Arrows

'Flight simulator'

Largest passenger aircraft ever built. "Why does it have to be so big?" "We had to make extra room for all the subsidy money."

'Thanks for flying in for the meeting.'

"It's cheaper than coach, and he gets more legroom."

"Hell: The Airport"

"How's my tripping you up?"

"I know by outward standard I'm successful, but a voice inside my head keeps saying, 'Where's your private plane?"

'Round-the-world ticket please!' - 'One way?'

"Have you decided where to travel?"

"Good news, sir – your carry-on has been upgraded to business class."

Airline: Arrivals, Departures, Missing Luggage and Missing Planes.

Man skated through airport with rollers on pull bag.

'For a little extra we can allocate you a seat inside the aircraft.'

"It's me. I was going through a 'Bon Jovi Phase.'"

"We want to fly the friendly skies, but only with friendly fellow passengers."

"There it is again, that tapping..."

'Your excessive weight is a too-heavy carry-on and we must charge accordingly, excessively!'

Flight nap

'Wait, what's that on runway one?...Ok I got it, just another one of those budget carriers.'

"Any chance of an upgrade?"

"I'm fine. It's just...I miss the confinement."

'Once you're seated and have safely stowed all carry-ons, we'll start the bidding for seat belts.'

Galley Christmas

"Sometimes I think the captain doesn't appreciate the seriousness of military maneuvers."

"With our lives it's all abut the journey. With our luggage, it's definitely about the destination."

'I'm tired of being a jet-setter. I want to settle down, raise kids, run my own airline...'

Sydney Airport - passengers called Barry, Sheila and Skippy.

"This guy's been acting kinda funny."

'Why isn't there zero tolerance to drugs and alcohol?'

'Want to buzz the airport?'

'When you said this was a three star hotel, I didn't expect to see them through a hole in the roof!'

"There! Just like new!"

"The first one depicts our sales compared to Snedly Electronics, and the second one depicts the speed of our corporate jet compared to Snedly's."