Island Investment Innovator Pillows

"My advice is buy flotsam and jetsam futures."

"You may have been the victim of a mis-sold PFI contract."

Phil would get giddy after a large print run, but the company was saving a fortune.

Money pouring in for a 'Acme Doodad Company's IPO.

Art of Surviving

'When you've a minute could you design a new health infrastructure for the area with budget forecasts staffing requirements and job descriptions...tomorrow will do.'

"The pension crisis prompted me to consider alternative invstments. Like Roulette."

"We have a new line of designer hedge funds...the Topiary Group."

"Usually when a person is stranded on an island, they make a grass hut. Apparently, you're more resourceful than that."

Castaway harnessing electricity.

"I want to switch all my municipal bonds into stocks, my stocks into T-bill and my T-bills into municipal bonds."

'A new concept. The inside out house.'

'Well, when can I have my bike back?'

Hell on trio island

'I've decided to follow my Grandson's advice and get out of stocks and into baseball cards.'

'Problems finding good, affordable housing?'

An astronaut sees a desert island in space.

"I wish we hadn't voted for this now"

'It's not a great start to his cartooning career...he's got creative block about what to call himself.'

'My first piece of advice is not to put all your eggs in one basket.'

"Are you playing footsie with me?"

'I'll only have one pack of nicotene patches this week. My mate's supposed to be getting me some cheaper ones from abroad.'

Never understood the 'buy low, sell high' theory.

'His head teems with new ideas.'

'He's one of the genuine food critics left...he still fills his pen with Spanish squid ink.'

"What happened to that lemonade stand of yours?"

Castaway uses a PC instead of a bottle.

'It's nothing personal, we just like to secure our intellectual property, each evening.'

'You're a genius Carlisle.'

Tax shelters of the rich and famous

"I really like to push the envelope. I've even been known to do quintuple-entry bookkeeping!"

Moai reading a book