Irony Explorers Pillows

Said Cohen? Who's askin? Someone who is about to make your dreams come true. Why? Are you gonna let me yell at you until you bleed? Caustic. Quick-witted just as Facebook led me to believe. What the heck are you talking about?!?! Nothing. Ready to experience pure joy? I'm ready to attack!!

'I wish to complain. It floated.'

'Teenagers!'

'Well, you got the dog to protect you against criminals. Perhaps now you'll have to hire a criminal to protect you from the dog.'

"Now you can send it."

Detective and child follow footprints using magnifying glasses.

Actual Extent Of Doug's Off - Road Adventures (Touching the kerb)

"Call me!"

"...it's another metal detector."

'I told you not to rely on the sat-nav.'

Safari tourists surrounded by lions following a 4x4 car crash.

" ... and if we finish pillaging early enough, we can still catch the evening Zumba class on the after deck."

"Look! I can almost spot the bar I should be in right now!"

'I just evolved the opposable thumb, and I've already got carpal-tunnel syndrome!'

"I'm feeling adventurous today, Penny – let's tack on a block."

'I wish I'd never seen Lost, now.'

'I fell off the wagon, again... meat wagon that is.'

"I've never liked 'im - he's an attention seeker!"

''Masterpiece Theater' will not be seen tonight, so that we may bring you 'Slushpile Showplace'....'

Bob suddenly felt uncertain about the journey which lay ahead.

The Shy Nudist Camp.

"...it was a bad idea getting them a kitten."

"If it makes any difference, it's a remarkable piece of plagiarism."

ACME, Inc. For the man who has everything. It's a home security company.

Planet of the Ants

"Psst! If you have any stock tips to pass on, I can probably lighten your sentence for insider trading."

"By the time I develop a true understanding of sand, I'll probably be forced into some sort of organized sports."

"I love these quiet evenings at home battling alcoholism."

Don't give up - Surrender.

'I realize this has been your favorite camping spot since you were a kid...but it's just not the same with all the construction over the years.'

'The Pope has decided to issue another apology for not issuing an apology.'

"...I'd like a mass of opiates please."

'I'm going to be a lot more decisive from now on. Well... maybe not a lot more, but at least a little more.'

'Ever think that if you make another billion you'll be happy, and then you do, but you're not?'

'Oh no! A Portuguese Man of War.'