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'I've taken my knowledge of science and math and applied them to fashion to produce a wardrobe that's guaranteed to malfunction to get you the most possible publicity.'

Killer Executive Suits.

"I'm off to the gym, where my private self and my public self converge."

Two women wearing identical dresses head toward exchange window at department store.

Leadership suits you

Men's business romper.

"But don't let my wacky tie fool you. We actually take business very seriously around here."

"If I'd known we'd be this long wandering the wilderness I would never have worn these heels."

A woman with a dog and a baby on a leash

"And now. . . which shoes?"

'At least we look cool. Especially with the wind chill factor.'

'Go ahead and laugh, but I lose my keys less frequently than you do.'

Mrs Howell packs 200 changes of clothing for a 3-hour tour.

Man admiring his patterned clothes in the mirror

"Can you give me a haircut that says, 'If you mess with my budget I'll rip out your soul, wring it like a dish towel, and drink it from a teacup'?"

Designer Kangaroo Pocket

'What are the other nonconformists wearing this year?'

"I'm starting my own movement—Occupy Fifty-Seventh Street."

One of the Ten Best Hair Days of the Year

Do you think I'm sixty?

1930's Lady.

"You're fortunate. Stubble looks really good on you."

Congratulations on the new you!

Vivienne Westwood

'Ouwth! Bid my tong!'

"I travel Prada whenever I can."

'Oi son, you're not going out dressed like that.'

Purple dress

"Mmm...'ll take these - they fit like a glove."

"Are you growing that mustache to make me break up with you?"

"You look pretty shifty in the getup. . . even for the subway."

"I'm not trying to be beautiful, I'm only trying to look better than everyone else there."

Fashion Update Dryer Sheets

"He's bought himself a red sport car, so I can't ride with him anymore: somehow, he says an old dog would be cramping his style..."

I want a car that says 'I've arrived' but didn't use too much gas getting there.