Ironic Optimist Gifts

'It is nice to have Springtime here at last.'

I heard you unexpectedly owe $9000 in taxes. That's awful. But look on the bright side. What bright side? Well, you probably won't be able to pay that off before next year's taxes come due

'I was sure I'd gotten away with it. Optimism can add years to your life sentence.'

'The good news is, I've got no more trouble with my stupid boss and grumbling customers. The bad news is, our company is insolvent and I'm jobless.'

A woman floats in the pool under the shade of an airplane

"Of course this'll be a great year. The data, sales projections, customer surveys, and my mom all think so."

"I feel like that I've been given a unique oppurtunity to speak out on issues."

'Oh for heaven's sake, you're a cow. Just eat grass and be happy.'

"In hindsight, we shouldn't have had him cremated."

"It's a long way to Enlightenment. You might need some cash."

"Admit it, we're lost."

Optimist

One man's obstacle is another man's stepping stone.

"Of course it's not clean energy -- We don't have clean ANYTHING!"

Six Thinking Hats

"This year I resolve to embrace change."

"I think I can". (train)

"Using worst case scenario as a baseline, I consider this data quite encouraging."

'Actually, my mom was the first to notice he'd lost that new boyfriend smell!'

'We had no contingency plan for things going right.'

"Don't you worry about me. I always land on my feet."

'The good news is that from now on I belong to a very rare species. There aren't many personnel managers who create their own pink slip.'

"Well, so much for my lucky hat! I've worn it to five interviews and not ONE callback!"

Always expect the best

"That's right - 'What doesn't kill me makes me stronger.' You just keep on thinking that..."

"Now then Mr Parker - are you relaxed?"

Big business is not evil

"I hate weddings. They make me feel a momentary lapse of cynicism."

"I just think things will work out for the best, and by the best I mean me."

'You say you're having trouble seeing into the future'

'Wow, that is a really big goal!'

Pollyanna, the Hamster

"Today stocks rose on the news that 'down' is a temporary state of mind."

Doug reasoned that things could be worse...but just how much worse...he wasn't sure??

"Oh, don't mind us... We just want to make sure it's really dead."