Ironic Music Lover T-Shirts

"Who told the quartet to play 'Highway to Hell'?"

'What a haunting melody.' 'Yes. It gives me the creeps, too.'

At the CD shop.

"That's it, Tom. Here they come. Just keep playing 'Freebird.'"

Covid Music

"I'll bet you can't name three of their songs."

David Bowie

Pub. This is John. He also loves obscure bands until they're popular then hates them. The Druidiots. Luckies. 50 ale.

"Interested in some romantic punk rock during your dinner?"

'Our financial troubles are over, Edna. The fellas and I have formed a boy band.'

'I don't leave until I've heard all 25 songs.'

"Hello, San Antonio - are you ready to rock in a fiscally responsible way?"

"The good news is he costs a quarter of what a string quarted would; the bad news is that, of course, he's suffocating."

'Hey, thanks for comin' out tonight. All these songs are from our new album, which was inspired by a recent trip to the grocery store...'

"Relax - not only does the devil have the best tunes, he's also got a great lawyer."

'I know.. Let's write a song all about the evils of material wealth. After all, that last one netted us a bloody fortune!'

Spoonstock.

"They listen to weird music, dress funny and you don't dare go into the bathroom after they've been in there!"

There were drastic cutbacks in the orchestra's budget.

Uke Free Zone

the Carpenters greatest hits...

'Darling, it's the local Satanists wondering whether they can sing us some black metal.'

"Would you care for some romantic music with your dinner?"

Air guitar. Air lighters.

'Listen; They're playing our song!'

"I'm their accountant. Trust me - I'm the one you want to get lucky with."

"Lemme tell you how I feel about high blood pressure, Mr. McGuinn."

"You're charged with blowing the roof off, bringing the house down, and totally killing it. How do you plead?"

Cello player with arrow instead of bow.

It was humming. What did you expect me to do? Teach it the words?

'He's got a really big sound.'

For Sale: Bagpipes, used only once by owner just before his murder.

What your acoustic guitar says about you

Somewhere in West Virginia

"My next song goes out to all those staffers who worry about job status in light of the recent reorg. It's called 'Somehow We'll Manage'."