Ironic Gift Enthusiast T-Shirts

Rodney kicked off his fitness regime by buying a heavier remote control...this was not enough.

"We still don't have a diagnosis for your rash, so we're going to run some more money on it and see what happens."

Please give so I don't have to sell reindeer blood for wine money.

Visit Santa today...sponsored by Acme Razor Company

'Would you believe a Roller Boot Sale?'

"But he had a mask and I thought he was a burglar."

Introducing... The Everything Else Morning-After Pill!

CEO.

'The worst thing about it is I'm claustrophobic.'

"Shouldn't have, you really."

Captionless: A fisherman is handed his bobbin and fishing hook by a octopus

"I think you've overfed the plant!"

On the fifth day, Neville opts for jewelry.

'I'd be more impressed that you bought me flowers if you didn't take a job as a delivery boy to get the employee discount.'

I love you Geyser...

'Wait until you see what you got me!'

"Read the card! Read the card!"

"I can't afford to feed you."

"I'm lost. Also, I accidentally unplugged something."

"Every Sunday, the same thing: we watch the ducks from Bow Bridge, I think about pushing you in, and then we go to that stupid Mexican place."

The Penultimate Temptation of Christ

Hunter hits duck with ejected shell.

A pianist uses a frog as a page turner.

So what else did you get for your birthday?

Fast Food Menus

"I'm not giving up the present till I see the party bag."

'What I really want, Santa, is a front row seat for the Olympic Beach Volleyball games.'

Giant sandwich bags.

"I see many gifts. They say do not open till Christmas."

"Violets are blue Roses are red Enjoy the dead mouse I hid in your bed"

'I don't know about you but I spend a fortune on shoes.'

'You're kidding? Your birthday wasn't REALLY six weeks ago was it, darling?'

Modern Day Cannibals

'Where are you, Mrs. Harris? I have another delivery for you.'

Chilli Quartet