Iron Maiden (appreciator) Mugs

Dick's hobby of collecting manhole covers kept him out of trouble... except of the hernias.

'I'd say your caravan's a tad overloaded, sir.'

'You're going to have to make some changes in your lifestyle.'

"We're at the top of the food chain and rulers of all we survey. What could possibly go wrong?"

"Hey, remember a few days ago, when all this was unacceptable?"

"Just don’t tell the other vultures. I’ll never hear the end of it."

"To save time, I'll just mention the people I’m not thanking."

Warrior Woman

"Our new information management system has just worked out where we wasted most money last year. . . It was on the new information management system."

Ironing day.

"I'm just saying, maybe we wouldn't need the swords if we didn't wear these clothes."

"I'm afraid he left everything to charity... Oh, I see. I take it your name's Charity?"

'Do you know how fast you were going?'

"The bad news is we've fired 80% of your office. The good news is we're fixing the coffee machine."

"The UWS association for the advancement of A.I."

"Day 736. Still loving the fact that I can smoke all over this island..."

'Good luck, everyone! Maybe this will be the year somebody finishes the race!'

Caution: ironic literal proverb ahead (fork in the road)

'Don't worry it's organic...'

"Here comes the quote unquote dog whisperer."

'And then, just to humor the guy I said 'I need a hug', little thinking that the big gorilla would do just that.'

"The last one is Uncle Charlie. He was pardoned in 1987."

"Beats me. They put up the sign and went to their panic room."

Met Office: Wet today and dry tomorrow.

'Do you have to be so melodramatic?'

'The company I ran was non-profit, but that wasn't intentional.'

'Doctor, how can I prevent wrinkles? Don't sleep in your clothes.'

Buy Back the Junk We Bought at Your Garage Sale

'I'm Bored'

"Reduced budgets are a challenge...Rather than just talk you through it we'd like to give you a practical demonstration of how to 'maximise' resources from limited resources."

Moses' TV guide.

"I hear post apocalyptic trilogies are all the rage again."

Freddie's water