Introspection Aficionado Gifts

PastFuture.

"It's interesting -- with each conviction I learn a little more about myself."

"My goodness, Marion. Our dishes are so spotless, I can see deep within my hollow, tormented soul!"

"I'm competitive,cruel,glad when my friends fail...I've no idea why I'm here."

I sensed I was moving forward in life, but it turned out to be the rest of the world going by my headed in the opposite direction.

Dear Diary...Resolutions

'I thought they'd hit it off. They're all going through their mid-life crises.'

" - and I've stopped talking to myself - I can't think of anything else to say.."

Banana Split Personality

'Nobody understands me at reasonable fees.'

'Is that your pensive look, Phipps, or just your meds kicking in?'

Wait, have I been talking to myself this whole time? Well, that's embarrassing.

The best thing about being my own worst enemy is that we're evenly matched.

Self Help: Get To Know Yourself/Get To Unknow Yourself

"Hon, I’ve been doing a lot of thinking, and I’ve come to the realization that thinking a lot messes with my head."

"Have you ever thought of your needs first?"

Existentialistical Funnies

The Anti-Agent

"Soul searching? Yes, you could call it that."

"I dunno, I guess I just don't believe in myself anymore."

Barks in code.

"That's our house, that's Mommy going to work, and that's you, staring out the window, wondering where it all went wrong."

"Let me slip into something a little more thoughtful."

"Don't you think it's time we talked about Operation Doug?"

"What was I thinking?!"

HDQTRS division, Motor Pool and Covert Ops.

Window Treatment

"He's his own worst enemy."

'Let's start out with cliches and pithy slogans - and work our way up to wisdom ...OK?'

"Existentialist Trail. Get lost then found. Nietzsche Park System"

"Talking to your own reflection? Even your imagination is pathetic."

I sometimes feel spotted, but I never really feel seen.

"Ever feel like even when you're barking at something you're still barking at nothing?"

That party went well.

Don Quixote is Caged (Don Quixote).