Introspection Aficionado Gifts

PastFuture.

"It's interesting -- with each conviction I learn a little more about myself."

"My goodness, Marion. Our dishes are so spotless, I can see deep within my hollow, tormented soul!"

"I'm competitive,cruel,glad when my friends fail...I've no idea why I'm here."

Dear Diary...Resolutions

'I thought they'd hit it off. They're all going through their mid-life crises.'

" - and I've stopped talking to myself - I can't think of anything else to say.."

Banana Split Personality

'Nobody understands me at reasonable fees.'

'Is that your pensive look, Phipps, or just your meds kicking in?'

Self Help: Get To Know Yourself/Get To Unknow Yourself

"Hon, I’ve been doing a lot of thinking, and I’ve come to the realization that thinking a lot messes with my head."

"Have you ever thought of your needs first?"

Existentialistical Funnies

The Anti-Agent

"Soul searching? Yes, you could call it that."

"I dunno, I guess I just don't believe in myself anymore."

Barks in code.

"Let me slip into something a little more thoughtful."

"That's our house, that's Mommy going to work, and that's you, staring out the window, wondering where it all went wrong."

"Don't you think it's time we talked about Operation Doug?"

HDQTRS division, Motor Pool and Covert Ops.

"What was I thinking?!"

"He's his own worst enemy."

Window Treatment

'Let's start out with cliches and pithy slogans - and work our way up to wisdom ...OK?'

"I'm the bad guy..."

That midnight hour when fleeting memories come home to roost.

"Are all Brits bisexual, or just the ones who publish their diaries?"

"Ever feel like even when you're barking at something you're still barking at nothing?"

Maximilian could see far away places,but he never told anyone.

That party went well.

"Talking to your own reflection? Even your imagination is pathetic."

Pastorius wonders why.

Don Quixote is Caged (Don Quixote).