
'I worked briefly in a Fine-China shop, but it didn't work out...'
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'I worked briefly in a Fine-China shop, but it didn't work out...'
'So you have a PhD, big deal, everyone working here has one! The question is, what can you really do?'
"I see by your resume that you're having trouble finding work because you pad your resume."
"Behold! I am God! I know all. Yet I'm constantly testing you even though I already know what you'll do. But I'll still punish you for the sins I planned for you to do. And you'll suffer in a fiery pit, tormented beyond imagining forever and ever and ever
'I'm sorry Timmy, but if I keep going for help, you'll never learn to take care of yourself,'
Darwin first tested his theory in a letter to a magazine ('Lookalike' letter points to similarity between man and ape.)
I have decided that all future board meetings will be held before lunch.
"When Butcher Bob gets back from lunch this one is getting a vasectomy."
'I'm referring you to a specialist who isn't as afraid to die as I am.'
'Ain't no lonelier life than being a free-range chicken boy.'
"Here's the problem. Your computer isn't obsolete, you are."
'I think cowboys are just plain lazy: Why else would you have to carry them all the time?'
Kisses--Sniff Your A-hole.
The Big Four debate banking ethics
Corona virus: "Wow, I seem to be getting lots of attention lately."
'The hair plugs are that noticeable, huh?'
"You've got to admit, he wears the 'that dog won't hunt' label with a lot of class!"
"We don't think you're management material."
"Isn't this just a repeat of his 1332 Christmas special."
STRIP Hambone: Computer health analysis
"Pandemic! That's a pretty name."
'Get with it, buddy -- that mile of highway you adopted has snow all over it!'
'Well, thanks for coming in. We'll get back to you.' The search for Big Foot continues.
"Mom, are we vegetarians for ethical or religious reasons?"
'Bless you!'
'Yes, I did receive your resume. As a matter of fact, I'm passing it around the office as we speak.'
'Time's up, chuckles.'
"Gwen, call the employment agency back, please, we just created our first 3-D employee!"
'Let's put it this way, part of you was offside!'
J-J-JOE'S B-B-BAR, 'Actually, Joe's done pretty well for a guy with a speech impediment.'
"No. I blew the interview when I sniffed the interviewer's behind."
Is it true that all cats are free thinkers? Yeah, we can't stand dogma.
"I just talked to Grunzman on the phone when he called in sick...I fear he really has got something very, very highly contagious!"
"I've found it the easiest way to administer nose drops!"
... I want you to sit in and keep prompting me not to swear.
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