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Modern day doomsayer

Polly txt speak

"If we can just get beyond this 'I'm the boss' mentality and concentrate on a simple 'What I say goes' outlook, I think this will all work out."

"...but the big question is, does the competition know that we don't know what we don't know?"

"I always check twitter before work, to see if yesterday's joke got me the sack."

"Since he got that thing, he mostly just kills time."

'We will not kick the can down the road... Does anyone know how to use a can opener?'

"God, I HATE this planet..!"

'The worst thing is not having access to your e-mail.'

OMG...WTF?....LOL!!!...SOS...

"Someone has hacked into our Computer."

Pavlov's Cat

'for more obit info, go to...'

"This is what I took away from the meeting."

"I may have been the runt of the litter, but online I'm the alpha dog."

Trump goes down tweeting & firing more staff

"It's not backstabbing if I tell our boss how lame you are while you're sitting here, is it?"

"If either of you know any cause or impediment why you should not be married, INCLUDING YouTube CLIPS, declare it now."

Dinosaur Group Think

"... And in the event of a sudden change in cabin pressure, please tweet with the hashtag #FeelinTheBreeze."

Holiday Gifts 2020

'This better be important.'

"Sorry, but your life moves so slowly that the ball keeps timing out."

Mankind's earliest ancestor emerges from the primordial ooze, closely followed by a prehistoric species of re-sealable plastic containers.

A bull which has seen red.

"Instagram . . . weAPPon of mass distraction."

Approved Debate Questions

"Social media makes it impossible to see, hear or speak no evil."

"It's our best trending merch."