Internet Explorer (not The Browser) T-Shirts

'Give me the name of your first girlfriend, first car, and first pet!'

"You have exceeded the maximum number of incorrect password attempts."

Ed Flanders, Deconstruction Worker

'3 Second Loading Zone.'

"You can access me by saying simply 'Agnes.' It is not necessary to add 'dot com.' "

My Bookshelf Before the Internet

"Let me just check my email, my texts, my missed calls, Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, WhatsApp, my credit score, my horoscope, the results of this latest personality test, the S. & P., the Dow, the news, this article about cute dogs, and the weather, and then we can go."

"Hey, the neighbors just installed a new wifi router."

'Let me through, I'm at Doctor.com.'

"Who ordered the double chocolate parfait with a cherry on top?"

'I want to make a positive environmental statement - What do you suggest I order?'

"I met him on an online dating site. He was on their 'return' section."

"I know, I know, every time we come here, I swear I'm going to try something new, but I always end up getting the same thing."

"Can I keep them? I found him on the internet?"

As you like it - 'Waiter, chicken with watercress please' 'I'm sorry sir we haven't any chicken left ... but if you wish I bring you a larger portion of watercress...'

"I'll have the Investigator's Special."

The Little Search Engine Who Could: 'I think I can...I think I can...'

'Thanks to the internet it is now possible to be extremely well-informed and completely wrong at the same time!'

'Homepage Sweet Homepage'

"That's odd. I visited an antibacterial soap website, and my computer got a virus."

"He loves his computer but it's a love that's not returned."

"Since he got that thing, he mostly just kills time."

"What does it mean? Heck, I don't know! It's mystifying!"

'Come on, you can help me to choose some lovely wallpaper.'

Digital Fomo!

Wasting away again in Cappuccinoville.

"Is the asparagus farm-raised or wild-caught?"

"Lazy? I've been social-networking my ass off."

'Ideas.com' desk with a 'come' tray and a 'gone' tray.

"You've got computer-breath."

"Because webmasters don't take out the trash, that's why"

"Spoiler alert! If you read the specials, you'll find out the Chef's Surprise!"

'Ooo! The dog food sounds good! ... mind you, I always have that at home.'

Dad Trophies