Internet Escapist Pillows

Cyb-R Safe: Offering the most convincing illusion of on-line security available today!

'These blinders help block out banner ads.'

"Now will you pay attention to me?"

"I’ve recently started self-medicating with viral pet videos."

I'm no longer on Twitter. I ran out of interesting things to say. Now I'm on Quitter.

www.islandcam.org Just when Doug thought things couldn't get any worse

Thanks for not tweeting me. I don't give a hoot what you're doing right now.

Mortimer J. Hackworth: 'Offline forever.'

"Goddess of Good give me strength! I must. . . get. . . off. . . the. . . internet!"

"Mom! Your cell phone’s ringing ... it’s Dad!"

Woman dreaming about being on vacation.

"Force quit! Force quit! Force quit!!"

'Where would you recommend for a tech-free experience.'

"I can hardly wait...TWO WHOLE weeks without having to deal with mindless e-mails, incessant interruptions, boring meetings...."

Second lifeReal life.

"Is there an option to make my out-of-office message permanent?"

"Slowly begin to reawaken the body with thoughts of unread E-mails, piles of dirty laundry, and the kids you have to pick up from school."

"I don't know what in blazes it means either, but just to be safe we'll put extra men on watch tonight."

"Outta my way. I need to check my email!"

Cyber Dream

Cat Asleep on a Computer.

'Man, I'm sick of thinking...can't someone flip on a T.V. or something?'

Academics at the Beach: Professor Wilson receives his email messages by the use of willpower alone.

Spam.

The income gap is widening into a massive divide. Instability will follow. I'm not pleading for the middle class, I'm pleading for our future. House of Java .net Cybercafe. We can't have only rich and poor, for that was goes serfdom, instability, and eventually, collapse through inevitable revolution from below. Are you following what I'm saying? Are you listening? Not just listening. I'm listening while also playing Angry Birds. I've got no chance here, do I? Me either. The higher levels are br

Hot Towel Web Service

I'd like to order a power outage. Huh? My wife's on her phone all day, my son plays video games nonstop. My boss finds me by email wherever and whenever. My pager rings 'round the clock! Say again? I was text messaging. Pull the plug, man!

"Master, you have 175,568 unread messages in your inbox."

"I'm looking for a data plan that will be constantly out of service so I can tell my dates I didn't mean to ghost them."

"When catch-up TV finally catches up"

Some days Ted's head would get stuck for hours.

'My battery is dead. How does it end?'

"Remember when we used to waste our entire lives for free?"

Spam.

"Gee... A wide screen, high-definition TV with Stereo-Gasm Sound and over 500 channels! It's almost like having a life!"