International Business Consultant T-Shirts

'I don't call expanding to New Jersey thinking globally.'

'Dear Mr Flagg - we are always very nice hearing from you. Your delighted letter, which we receiving of you...pile it on thick. They really eat up this broken English.'

'We had to think globally since the American consumer was finally on to us.'

'It's not surprising. The production department is in Spain, the warehouse is in Korea, the accounting division is in Bolivia, the board of directors is in Canada.'

"That's obvious by looking at the map."

'In the modern world manufacturing takes place in China. Most R&D is one in South Korea and support and logistics is based in India.'

'And here's where we hold our Japanese management seminars.'

"Tariffs"

"He said, 'Oh, good, you brought the translator.'"

'Stop panicking, hombre, If the French are cornering the Chinese auto market, all we need to do is corner the Chinese repair shop market,'

"Bert, I'm confused. What happens after we circle the wagons, tighten our belts and walk a mile in our customer's shoes? Is that when the chickens come home to roost?"

"I'm going to bombard you with graphs until you agree with me."

"Forget five-year plans. Let's just figure out how to make it to lunch."

'Now that I have your attention...'

"And need I remind you, the 'art of the deal' is the lifeblood of this company."

Phrenology bust with sections for different currencies.

"This is a merit-based organization! Can't you see I’ve hired the very best and most qualified yes-men money can buy?"

British savings accounts

"My email is down... talk to me."

Golly, �1m a year isn't too much. I don't know why your shareholders don't understand you.

"Miracles happen, gentlemen, but they don't come cheap."

"We need to make some cuts. We'll start with integrity, accountability, openness, and transparency."

"This is not permanent...we'll be back as soon as things start to look up."

'The check is in the email attachment.'

"I'm afraid 'It's a surprise', doesn't cut it as a growth strategy."

'This time we're going to do things right. And if that doesn't work, we'll just go back to stealing.'

I hope a starting salary of 80 and a severance of 12 is acceptable....

"I was just going to say, 'Well, I don't make the rules.' But, of course, I do make the rules."

"I don't want a G.O.A.T, I want a S.C.A.P.E.G.O.A.T."

'This job is for a 30 hour week. . .but to achieve that you need to work 60 hours a week.'

"Everyone at Megadrug is committed to the benefits of spoken therapies, which is why we developed 'nitrazone' to enhance the experience."

"Another job well done by your conflict resolution specialist."

Two children are running lemonade stands outside their home; one stand is more popular than the other.

"Third quarter numbers were good after we cut our global workforce three to two."

Others will fight for you