Interior Enthusiasts Mugs

"Jeffrey makes all our furniture himself."

"The point of going outside is the feeling when coming back inside."

"I spilled a red dot of paint, so I painted the whole room so you wouldn't notice it."

'Is that the only wallpaper you could find?!'

Walking a dog on a treadmill.

"Oh, wow! Is that stunning or what?" "Mid-century classic. Should be in a museum. Let's pee on it." "Totally."

Fittd shēt

"The knights of the round accent table"

"I just love how wet you've made things in here."

Four Common Lampshade Mistakes and How To Avoid Them.

"I only scratch up the furniture hoping they'll replace it with something more stylish."

Lay-Z-Family Recliner

"How much?! Blimey, to get my money's worth, I'd need to use it EVERY WEEK!"

Waiting Room Quarterly

"If it's got my ass on it, it's befitting of royalty."

James decided to stay in that night.

"It's beautiful. I'm just not sure it's $800 beautiful."

Unknowingly, with one swish of his blood soaked mammoth tail he was inflicting pain and suffering on billions of unborn people. Home decorating had been invented.

"The artist-in-residence is struggling a bit, but other than that we're fine."

"I'm ready to go whenever you're through fussing with tablescapes."

Clown couple in bed with wavy mirror above their bed.

"Yup, looks like your bookcase is full. You might want to start thinking about getting a new one."

'For heaven's sake Janet - where have you disappeared to now?'

"Hey, take me home with you! Position me at a slight angle next to the elegant glass soap dispenser in the guest bathroom. It'll look great, you'll see!"

'Oh, honey, what a lovely house... We'll place the couch here, the cupboard there and my psychiatrist right here!'

Waiting to do the second coat was the worst part. It was like watching paint dry.

"I worry about you, Dinkins. . . you seem to be losing the big picture."

"Hmmm. Not sure it will go with my wife."

"The mirrors really do make this apartment look bigger."

Has socks and foot stools of every kind sale.

Yellow Fever: What you may catch if your painter sneezes.

"That's still too high"

Staycation Photos

'This one's got a mahogany finish, easy to assemble and comes with a magical kingdom as standard.'

"Sir, there are no waitresses or menus — this is Crate & Barrel."