Inner Sales Guru Prints

'It's easy, Greg. Just get in touch with your inner regional sales manager.'

'I think you are taking this elevator pitch way too literally'.

Larry's used art

'What do you do with the time you save?'

"So then the VP of Sales looks right at me and says 'Larry, what's going on? We don't have any traction in the market.' Like it's MY fault!"

"We don't call them 'horns' anymore. They're interactive audio crash deterrent stimulators."

The Salesman

Target your customer.

'Maybe the reason we don't have those 'off the chart' sales anymore is because our charts are too big.'

"It's a 'Black eye friday'. I got it in a fight over a 56 inch TV."

'Miss Raleigh. I'm studying megatrends. Bring me some megavitamins.'

'The client has asked that you please stop referring to the product as, 'Crappy Crap Crap.'

Real Estate Krisp Flakes: Location! Location! Location!

"Hey! Plants are on sale again! Woo-hoo!"

Bob thinks his new neighbor may be bad for business.

'Our most successful e-mail campaign was an offer to take customers off our e-mail list.'

"Can I talk to someone who knows something?"

Women's sportswear - Sale on paradigm shifts.

A close shave on the Titanic...

"Post holiday sales look similar to the crater that killed the dinosaurs."

Brick Salesman

Painting

"We're estimating that sales are now up to about here."

"Maybe we'd do better if we called ourselves 'baristas'."

Early man learns that by walking upright, his hands become free to do many useful things.

'Don't worry, the dog's a sales manager!'

Rudy, I've noticed your upsells have fallen drastically over the last 16 years. More and more, you just give customers what they ask for instead of pushing them to buy a larger cup, an extra cookie, or a 3-minute bathroom pass. That is unacceptable. So I've signed you up for my mandatory "How to Upsell" course and ordered you the reading material. Tuition fees will be deducted from your check. As your first lesson, I've upgraded you from the 2-week course to the 15-day one for just $50 extra. Ve

"I'm a pragmatist, Leon. Before I put a new product on the market, I ask myself, 'Will it sell?' "

'We now have 28 subscription cards in every issue, but we MUST HAVE MORE!'

Seeing progression motivates.

"Okay, let me come at this question a different way: Does anybody here actually know how to sell anything?"

'I don't get it... Our business model was exactly the same.'

'I think scroll sounds better than 'continuous media,''

Whatever works for you.

"Yes, we do have an incentive scheme - fall below that line and you're sacked."