Initiation Gifts

"C'mon, man, we're gonna need you to find that or...things might not workout with you."

"You're very interesting, for a civilian."

"Where else in the world would you get such wonderful sunsets?"

"Let's just say I have a pre-existing condition."

'I can't force jocose if I'm not feeling it.'

"So, you say I'll be doubling the numbers of animals I kill?"

"You're such a good listener."

Freedom comes at a cost. We must be willing to pay the ultimate price. Retail.

"Anna - there's someone I'd like to meet."

"I know this is not a proper job for a PhD, Mom, but I have student loans to repay."

What nationality were your parents? North or south Poles?

"You know how it is, one minute I'm selling insurance in South Dakota and the next minute I have a hook for a hand. How about you?"

"This has nothing to do with you ... this is between us and the tree."

'I like you, you remind me of someone.'

"He's sworn never to say Boudicca, ShrOwsbury, whoM, or narrative."

"She likes to be included, so I told her the tea is called 'Squirrel Grey.'"

"Gals, you know I hate being the center of attention, so for the next 45 minutes I am going to monologue about all the minute details of my wedding planning."

"I need him to stop think and start listening."

'What sort of wines do you like?' ... 'Powerful ones!'

"Remember how I've always had a hard time asking for help?"

"Not to brag or anything, but I'm the elephant in the room at my company."

"Idea?" "No. Just a light bulb."

When did you first feel like a male trapped in a female body? When I was a foetus.

"That's not a knife crime initiative. That's a knife crime initiative!"

"Pssst! I had some CGI done."

“Hey Everyone! It’s the first day of Fall! Okay, you go first!”

“I may not know much about books, but I do know which titles burn best.”

"How to talk to people" "Make them rue the day"

"He gets easily abstracted."

"I want to be a more interesting person. Think maybe watching old black and white movies would do it?"

"Remember, if I can't introduce you it's because I can't remember their name - so that's when you step in and introudce yourself so we can get them to say it, okay?" - Company Party Prep.

'My boyfriend's a Cardiologist.'

"I can't go much longer without your asking why I'm vegan."

"...and she said 'MOO!'"

"I'm starting my own movement—Occupy Fifty-Seventh Street."