Industry Leader Pillows

Lord Avariss - Captain of Industry

"This is a merit-based organization! Can't you see I’ve hired the very best and most qualified yes-men money can buy?"

"Stock options for your thoughts."

"We need to make some cuts. We'll start with integrity, accountability, openness, and transparency."

"Actually, she's just a figurehead boss. Our real CEO is an algorithm floating around somewhere in the cloud!"

'I'm judging by your silence Al that you're giving me the green light on the Greenwich project. I just want to say that I admire your leadership. I guess that's why you've been running this company for 20 years.'

"If we can just get beyond this 'I'm the boss' mentality and concentrate on a simple 'What I say goes' outlook, I think this will all work out."

'How can we solve this problem by eating?'

'A few more years in this job and you'll learn how to delegate stress.'

'We're finding out that those 'wrongs' we made 'right' were actually right after all.'

'Since I'm new here, let's start by clearning the air. You may have noticed that I'm short for a C.E.O. . .'

'We're here to carbon date your company's carbon footprint.'

'The good news is I had a very good year.'

Leadership in the Covid-19 Era

"I suppose just climbing the greasy pole is no longer an option..."

'The downside to my meteoric rise to the top is that I didn't have the opportunity to step on many people.'

'Don't worry. No one else knows what they are doing either.'

"Leadership is all about knowing who to delegate responsibility for all your mistakes."

CEO du Jour

'Will you kindly remind the rest of the staff that I'm the managing director - not the Godfather!'

'Loved your bit on market share, Felton - perfect blend of plausibility and outright deception.'

"My salary app pings when another new male exec at my level is making more than 77% of what I make."

'I have been hearing some disturbing comments about you, Parker, some of your employees think you're a nice guy!'

'In my rise to the tip I was always aware of a higher power - now I feel I'm ready to take it on.'

"We've also been given ten top employment law tips."

"Today we are going to find out if you can that leap."

"C'mon people! All for me and me for me!"

'As meetings go that was one of my better ones!'

'Great job at today's meeting, Dunwoody. You're finally discovering your own voice as a yes-man!'

"Openness and transparency are a big part of our corporate mythos."