Indian Food Devotee Pillows

Samosas

"Repent" "Give alms" "Resist temptation" "Pray for me" "Fasting" "Acts of service" "Sacrifice" "Abstain" "You are ashes" "You are dust" "No meat"

'I go to St. Patrick's Church, I go to St. Patrick's School, and my name is Patrick. Is it also necessary for me to eat green food?'

"I hope you won't repent afterwards, Vicar, It's a devilishly hot vindaloo!"

Waitress to church leader: 'It's your daily bread, Pastor. Remember? You ordered the prayer breakfast.'

Church Basement Foodie

'Which would be more Zen ? a pizza with nothing, or a pizza with everything?'

"If He didn't want us to eat it, why'd He wrap the whole thing in bacon?"

'You go ahead and eat. I'm on a raw food diet and surfer isn't part of it.'

"Since you're into burnt offerings you should come over some Sunday for one of her special dinners."

"I know, boy—I miss the smoked salmon at Zabar's, too."

Holy Macaroni,

'Pigs feet, sir? 'ARE THEY PICKLED?'

"Let there be light hors d'oeuvres."

'Those wafers are no good. Why don't they have cookies?'

"For what he is about to receive may the dog be truly thankful."

"Excuse me, Father...is the host gluten-free?"

"I'd better not eat any more broccoli. I'm saving room for spiritual food."

"Careful it's hot." (Colour)

"Oh -- I've got one! If you could have dinner with anyone from history, living or dead, who would you have cater it?"

'Of course I followed the diet religiously. I do everything religiously.'

'Today's sermon is on the feeding of the five thousand...and I'll be giving you the recipe for that.'

'I enjoyed the deviled ham, the deviled eggs and the devil's food cake, but we need a menu more in tune with our mission.'

"First, do no ham."

"Put some spiritual food in there."

God Cooks Up Evolution

Bishop reads menu which features only loaves, fishes, water and wine.

"There, there, Dear. Brother Amos momentarily slipped back into his secular life when he said your cake is 'sinfully good'."

'And if this food does what I think it will - may we all meet in Heaven.'

Holy Pizza

'Are you going to say Grace, Sir, or shall I?'

Cheeses of Nazareth.

'That was a short prayer, Grandpa. . . you must be really hungry.'

'You realize, we can't have frozen yogurt EVERY day.'